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Married to the bottle: saving your relationship from alcoholism

Author: Kari Lloyd
Published: Sep 25 2013

Studies indicate that there are 17.6 million people in the U.S. who have a serious issue with alcohol. Unfortunately, this means that many people will end up in a relationship with an alcoholic, and the damage that drinking causes can make it very difficult to stay together. After all, a lot of alcoholics either get mean or depressed when they are intoxicated, and this can create an unsafe pattern that includes physical or emotional abuse.

According to legal experts Katz & Phillips, "This is also something the abuse of alcohol can also lead to, problems such as DUI's." Therefore, whether you are an alcoholic or you are married to someone who has a dependency on alcohol, it is vital to take steps to get the bottle put away permanently.

Tips for Saving Your Relationship from Alcohol

1) Openly Discuss the Problem - Getting someone to admit that they have a problem with alcohol is the first step. However, you need to be prepared for your spouse to get defensive, especially if they are not ready to seek help. Therefore, you should approach the subject gently, and make sure that you do not say anything accusatory. Instead, remain as supportive as possible, and take steps to reinforce the fact that you love them while the conversation is happening.

2) Attend Meetings with Them - If your partner is willing to get help, you should offer to be by their side while they go to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. After all, having a strong support system is one of the most important pieces of kicking an addiction, and your presence will also make your spouse more likely to actually stay for the entire meeting.

3) Stop Enabling Them - One of the biggest problems that alcoholics face is the tendency for others to enable them to continue drinking. Most people will say that they give in and let the person buy alcohol because it is easier, but taking the easy path is not the right way to save your relationship.

Therefore, you need to let your spouse know that you will no longer pick up alcohol for them, and this is something that you will need to stick with even when they go through the symptoms of detox. Additionally, let them know you will no longer be their designated driver when they drink, and they will face a DUI if they choose to drive.

4) Use Praise Freely - Any small victories should be celebrated when an alcoholic is attempting to stop drinking. Therefore, you should praise your spouse each time they hit a milestone, such as getting through their first full week without taking a drink. It will also be necessary to give your partner some emotional leeway during the first month. After all, they are going to be dealing with a lot of physical and psychological stress as a result of giving up alcohol, so you will need to be more patient with them.

As long as your partner admits that they have a problem, you can help them improve their life by giving up alcohol. However, it is important to remember that they are most likely going to make mistakes. Getting drunk, sneaking alcohol and DUI's are common in someone who has just quit hitting the bottle. Therefore, you will need to be patient and supportive throughout the process, but make sure that you do not cross over the line into enabling their addiction.

Former drinker and writer Kari Lloyd understands how difficult the process of giving up alcohol can be, and has found a great deal of help online during her process. DUI attorneys Katz & Phillips have a wealth of information available on their website, and checking out local meetings offers support in person.

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