PeoplesProblems Logo

Have I cheated?

Default profile image
I have been dating a woman for 6 weeks. During week 3 she asked me if I was currently seeing someone, I said no. The relationship has been progressing and feels more solidified. In week 5 I slept with a girl while I was on vacation. It was not premeditated. I told her I was dating someone and that I couldn't do anything. After she kissed me I stopped thinking about the implications of what I was doing and had sex. I feel really awful about this. The only way I see to make myself feel better is to think that I did not have an exclusivity talk with the girl I am dating. We have since had that and I would never dream of slipping up like this again. Any advice you can give me?

Have I cheated?

Default profile image
"We have since had that and I would never dream of slipping up like this again." OK - so keep calm and carry on. No need to beat yourself up now. But - wait - Are you really ready to be exclusive? May I ask your ages?

Have I cheated?

Default profile image
You can only cheat if you are both devoted to each other. Dating is a type of devotion where you two decided to exclusively see each other only, unless you agreed to keep dating others while you two see each other. If you did not agree to such arrangement, you cheated. Another thing to note, is your own personal ethics - if you feel guilt, you cheated. It is as simple as that. You wanted to be loyal, and you failed. Your best option, is to inform your current "date" what you did. You are under no obligation of course, but it will make you feel better. At least you were honest. And she will see you for that - even if she does not want to be your partner anymore, she will at least know you are an honest person. Most women know it takes balls to confess what you did behind their back, and while they may be pissed - even a good ole slap in the face and ignore you for a while, they may just come back since you were honest. Trust me. Never telling her, and she finds out - you don't want to know a woman s evil side of not only being stepped-out-on, but lied to (omission is a lie too) So in essence to answer your question Yes you cheated on your date - go talk to her. You don't have an excuse but at least tell her how you feel. ps 6 weeks and you step out? I would be curious as to how old you are too.

Have I cheated?

Default profile image
To me, it sounds like you guys were NOT YET at the point of agreement to be exclusive, I suspect that she was developing feelings for you at week 3, and just asked you, so that she would have an idea of where the relationship might go. Here are my thoughts... 1) DON'T TELL HER...Iyou will offend and hurt her, and likely lose her as well as any further chance of the budding relationship. It's not worth it! This was a chance for YOU to make some decisions about how you feel about her. Now you know. 2) If you go on another fun vacation, GO TOGETHER. Vacation sex with your lover is amazing!! 3) let it go!! Don't allow this vacation fling to affect you and your gal's time together...it was a fling, its over, you were not married! Concentrate on you and she, and enjoy what that may bring.

This thread has expired - why not start your own?

B-4