Boyfriend is not supportive of law enforcement career change
This is my first time posting a thread on this website, but I would like some guidance from someone who may have been in my situation or knows how to guide those in need. I'll keep this as short as I can. Since I was in high school.. I always wanted to pursue a career in criminal justice/law enforcement. I had hopes and dreams but decided to take the path of cosmetology because I didn't want to go to university. I had my son at the age of 18. My boyfriend of almost 5 years is his dad. We've been very comfortable with my career path, however, I got accepted into a police academy and I will be starting in a couple of weeks. They only take the best of the best, they've said. This is what I've always wanted and nothing has ever felt so right. Now that I'm changing paths, he isn't supportive and keeps threatening to leave me. I'm at a loss because I can't seem to understand why he would want to throw away the foundation we've built together because Im going to be a cop. (God willing) i know it's challenging and I know I'll be gone most hours of the night and even day. He talks crap about LEOs and is close minded to say the least. What should I do? It'll be at least one year until these changes happen but with the police academy coming up, reality is starting to sink in. I don't want to give up my dreams for a man who can't support them but I don't want to lose the man I love..
Have a look at the man you love and ask yourself if he's worth it because if he was 100% supportive of you and loved you the way that you love him, he would be encouraging you to pursue your career in every way. He would possibly be discussing his fears and anxiety about it with you, but he wouldn't be threatening to leave you. 5 years is a lot of history, history which would have given your BF a good idea of what your career aspirations were. Some serious communication with him should get you past his close minded crap talk to find out his real reasons which leads him to threaten to walk out the door from not only you and his relationship, but also his 5 year old child.
It's not so much about "we've been very comfortable with my career path", rather it should be that YOU are happy with your career path and you need a partner who supports you in every way to be successful with this path, regardless of what your chosen career is. Your priorities would be your BF and your child plus your law enforcement career, and not necessarily in that order, if he supported you, but if he doesn't, then it's you, your child and your career. We all make sacrifices for those who we love and even in the most difficult circumstances, we often make them after successful communication and negotiation. Don't waste the person you really are by trying to keep others happy at your own expense.
Thank you so much <3 j
Well maybe he's concerned you are entering a career whose members have a high divorce rate and engage in dangerous situations. He may be very afraid.
Can you compromise and pursue a career in another area? Like EM or medical field?