Strongest connection to someone i have ever felt in my life
Just had to get this off my chest. It has been on my mind for a week straight now and just need to let it out.
So I just went on a trip for my sisters wedding. We got back last week. Our entire family was with us including my Fiance, who I am marrying in a few months. We have been together nearly 8 years and she is my best friend and an amazing women, absolutely amazing. I have never had any doubts about our relationship in any way shape or form until this weird little thing happened to me this past week. Never cheated or anything. Don't get me wrong, our relationship has never been perfect but we both work at it when times have gotten tough.
So my Fiance and I decided to go rent Jet skis for an hour and it's out in the middle of the ocean, and there were probably 20 other riders out on the water. I noticed this woman following me and i caught myself doing the same thing, thinking it was my Fiance (she was the only other brunette out there). I decided to take my jet ski into the dock a little early because i was a tad hungover, and my head was pounding. This women follows me into the dock, maybe she didn't intend to, but she did.
I'm on the dock and i see this girl up close for the first time, and i get this overwhelming feeling. I have never felt this in my entire life. It was just this instant connection. she smiled at me and tells me she thought that i was her boyfriend out on the water the entire time. we laughed and exchanged small talk and i told her that i thought she was my fiance.
I could not take my eyes of this women. not only because she was beautiful, but just the intense connection i felt. My fiance and I, and her boyfriend and her ended up riding all back together on the boat and the entire time i just looked down and out of the corner of my eyes, i could see this women staring at me as well. It's like we both knew their was some intense connection. i know this sounds absolutely ridiculous but I had just never felt something so intense in my life.
So we get back to shore and we go our seperate ways. I couldn't stop thinking about this women, it's now been almost a week since i've been home and I seriously cannot stop thinking about what happened. Two days after i had seen her, i am running late for my flight. My fiance is checking in our luggage and I am literally running through the airport to get a line in security so we don't miss the flight. I kid you not, as i'm running to security, this girl walks straight in through the door and it about stopped be dead in my tracks. We made instant eye contact, like something out of a movie. I smiled and we both laughed a little and i said hello as i kept running by and as i'm running away i keep looking back and she is still smiling at me. That was the end of it. She went her seperate way and I went mine. I never got a name or anything.
I am not sure what to think of what happened. This entire week had be doubting my own relationship and future marriage, and not once in nearly 8 years with her have ever doubted us. I've had the worst anxiety all week and my head is just a mess. I know it's not the best story in the world but just curious of what other people think of the situation or has anyone ever experience this.
I seriously can't get this women out of my head, and wonder if I am crazy and if she even felt the same way but it seemed like she did without a doubt. I just have this overwhelming feeling to see her again and speak to her but i know that's not possible, i don't even have a name, let alone where she lives. Any thoughts would be appreciated!
Please don't discount this, but this will happen to you again, maybe even several times in your life. (don't even ask me how many times for me)
There are just certain people who connect together, immediately. Some even say it's feelings from a past life. It's something that happens and there's no explanation for it; it just is such a explosion and draw that it seems magical. The fact that you two mistook each other for your fiances is also another reason you were attracted to this person. If she were not so beautiful, would you have felt the same? Things to think about . . .
But - it's good you are looking at this and questioning your readiness for marriage. Because the next time you meet another woman like this, you will have to pull yourself in because you will be married and promised by a vow. Are you ready for that finality?
May I ask your age? I just wonder because 8 years is a long time to be with someone without marrying. If this is a teenage love, and now you are in your 20's, then you have missed those learning "explosions" all those years. Maybe you are just waking up to being receptive to other women. How many times have you been in love?
If she wasn't so beautiful, honestly, I'm not sure how i would have felt. It wasn't the beauty that initially attracted me. It was just the unexplainable connection i felt with her. Like you said, just an explosion of feelings. What threw me off gaurd, is that she wasn't the type of women i am usually attracted too. Its almost hard to put into words what i felt.
As far as saying no to other women. That has not been a problem for me, i have had my fair share of chances through the years but i could never cheat on her. Im 26. We started dating when i was 18, and i joined the military straight out of highschool, went active duty and deployed twice to Afghanistan and she has stuck by through some of the absolute worst and hardest times of life. Thankfully, i was stationed not far from my hometown and could drive home on the weekends to see her, but she went through 2, 8 month deployments with me.
You are right about missing out on some of the parts with other women. I won't deny that. There have been a few times where i do feel like i have missed out on experiencing other women, but at the end of the day, i always felt like ...would a few 1 night stands or short term relationships be worth what i have with my fiance. There is no way in hell any of that would be worth throwing my relationship away.
I am sure there will be more times that this will happen in my life, like you said, and maybe this is the first of more to come, but this women hit me like a punch to the gut and maybe it's just a learning experience. I appreciate the response and points you brought up, thank you!
"Swept up in the moment" I'd say.
You ARE going to have these types of experiences, and I really encourage you to take these on. Just not with the opposite sex, but culturally, physically, artistically,and socially.
You are still young. You have been with one person or deployed (isolated) twice. That is a lot of time out of years 18 - 26.
I encourage you to explore the world a bit and get "swept up" a few times before you settle down.
(You don't want to hit 40 or 50 and regret that you didn't stretch yourself a bit by facing a few "swept up" moments in a variety of situations.)