I think my boss is a psychopath narcissist
I'm a 37 yo professional female and have been at my current career 5 years. I think I am proficient to pretty good at my job. Based On my performance reviews this would be accurate. I recently left a really bad job situation where I was constantly given a terrible schedule only after I signed on. So I'm now 3 months into a new place. When I signed on I was told I'd work mostly at one location and a couple months at another. This second location is undesirable. Basically it's understaffed. That's the short version. The work is also slightly different than what I enjoy. But I agreed to 2 months because it's part of the job and that's life, right? Well before I could even get started this boss calls me up and moves me to three months at the undesirable site. Saying it is a "temporary situation due to someone resigning". I politely said I don't really enjoy this style of work as much and have some concerns. But I agreed to help out in the spirit of being kind and the new gal on the block.
Fast forward three months and the schedule for the next year comes out: now it's 4 months. You see where this is going. As do I.
So I sent a polite email to my boss expressing my concern that my time at the main site was decreasing and I'd really appreciate if we could stick to our agreement that I spend three months at site B. I cited my level of experience (there are at least 8 employees with less experience) as well as stating that in my previous job I was taken advantage in my previous position so I am skiddish to go down this path again of changing schedules.
My boss went BALLISTIC.
I was called in. Told that I "don't know how to write an email. "Was offensive to him that I would compare him to my previous boss" (he knows her and does not like her) and that he "treats everyone the same and absolutely fairly". (I'm learning that's not true but of note I did not reference it in my email at all.)
We had an intense conversation in which I defended my email and the contents of it. I was polite but firm. He told me despite having more experience my colleagues with less experience were "superior to you in other ways" which he could not elaborate on. He then spent 45 minutes going in circles with me about why I was not suited well for site A and needed to be at less desirable site B. None of the "reasons" made any sense to me. Eventually. After 45 minutes of pain, confusion and him telling me to sympathize with how hard his job is he gave me what I wanted. He left it as "while you were completely unprofessional I can tell this is important to you. But don't expect any more 'favors' in the future".
It's not a favor. It's what I agreed to when I signed on! I let that go and walked out.
I am beyond angry. I think this man is a user. And possibly crazy. I love about 90% of the other people I work with. I love the work. I enjoy my day to day work. I make good money. Yet I'm left feeling I want to quit and get away from this man. Forever.
Most employers employ people to their standard. In any company, be it big or small, if the boss or higher management are 'good person people and good negotiators', they'll be, most likely, surrounded by people of the same ilk. If they're lousy managers and lack skills, then it's usually because their boss is the same.
Going by your post, your boss lacks certain qualities concerning people management and it's your choice as to if you stay with the company seemingly because of this behavior and management style. Rather than tell you not to expect favours in the future, he could have explained more clearly why, in his opinion, you're more suited for site B. He was basically looking for a solution to a problem but lacked the skills to 'sell it' and instead, highlighted his insecurities.
As with everything in life, if you're boss isn't prepared to negotiate, or doesn't know how to, and you're not budging from your initial agreement, then it's a lose/lose situation rather than being a win/win. You had a 'win' but you have come away from it wanting to quit, so you won the battle but not the war, but that's life, right?