What's a normal response to finding someone cheating?
I'm having trouble understanding if this is a typical response or this guy is crazy. I was seeing him for 2.5 months exclusively but then things started to get not so great so I told him I wanted to take a break. About a week into the break I realize I'd like to possibly start seeking ing him again. Tell him this but also tell him I want to take it slow, that I can't give him much, etc. well last night he
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Anyway, I am going to go ahead and assume that while you were on this break, he cheated on you. Am I right?
How did you respond to this? You actually never got to say.
Well let's pause here for a second, and take a look at the situation.
On the one hand, you were on a break. Things hadn't been working out, so you made the decision to end any sort of unofficial obligation the two of you had to one another. Maybe sleeping with somebody else was part of how he chose to deal with it? I'm not justifying that behavior, but at the same time the fact of the matter is you were with him, and then told him you didn't want to be with him. You can't treat this like he was still in a relationship with you and cheated on you, because he didn't.
...On the other hand, I find it pretty astounding that this guy was able to find a rebound fling so quickly. Usually that doesn't happen so fast. I don't really know what this says about this person. It could mean that he is a player and a creep. Or that has really decent social skills, or that lots of women find him attractive. It could also mean that he is a friendly and likable guy who knows a lot of women that would be happy to sleep with him if you didn't want to.
You chose to take a break from seeing this guy for a reason. Why?
You realized a few days into your break from one another that you'd possibly like to continue seeing him again. Why?
Is the realization that this guy can get other girls a frightening one for you? Well then, you probably now understand how most men feel when dating women. Usually the shoe is on the other foot, and it is women who have more options of men to date, while men are competing with several other available (and not-so-available) men for one woman's affection. It's not a fun reality, but that's the way it is. Likewise, some men are luckier than others and have a greater number of women to choose from.
At the end of the day, this seems to really be about you weighing pros and cons and deciding whether this man's actions were forgivable given the circumstances.
Sometimes, it's best to remain single for a while or to see if you can maintain a friendship with someone before asking them to become serious.