this is a weird and confusing situation... my ex and i broke up back in march, she "needed time and space" 3 weeks later she came back saying how sorry she was and whatever. i was devastated at the time, but eventually got over it and then bang.. she just pops back up into my life. i forgave her and decided to work on things. she left for 3 months this past summer and we spoke but didn't see each other which really hurt our progress on things. i left for school and things never really took off. i found out she started talking to some guy at home and addressed it and she said they have hung out, they do speak, and they're friends. I've always had a suspicion about that because it was always weird. in october i actually caught them hanging out when she said she was somewhere else. i brought it up and we got into a fight. she said they're only friends blah blah blah. after that i was fed up and just cut contact all together. 2 weeks later (this was in november) she texted me saying she wants to work on things and be together and the whole 9 and what not. i agreed to start talking again but wanted to know everything that has happened in the past so there were no surprises. things went okay, but it never seemed like she was giving the full effort i was to make things work. we go to the same gym and she would barely speak to me there, but we would see each other and do errands and go for dinner about 2-3 times a week. well.. about a week ago she was at the gym and was talking to this guy (the one that i caught her hanging out with when she lied months prior) and was ****. i texted her asking if she's sure its not anything more than a "friendship." well that caused a huge fight about me "not trusting her" and how "we continuously take steps backwards". i, once again, apologized and said it was my fault. she hasn't spoken to me all week and I've reached out a few times but have given her space. THEN, two days ago and yesterday she is talking to and hangout with the SAME guy at the gym. coming with each other, leaving with each other. i haven't said anything and neither has she. i am literally so confused and have no idea what to do if anything. as of right now i consider things to be completely over.. any brutally honest insight would help, thanks
Well, you should block her and never accept her calls, emails and complete cut. Here are the reasons why. 1. She doesn't love you and never will. . The reason women say they want space because they know they dont love a guy and want to date other guys, she dated other guys since march, got dumbed, used , mistreated, so she remembered about you, she was having nostalgia of a nice guy ( i don't know you, or your treatment, but judging her behavior, you will understand why later) ,
2. She is using you as a back up. She wants to date other guys as stated above, but the reason she doesn't want to loose you because she thinks you are the nice guy, the guy to settle down with, so she is holding you, so you don't move on find someone so she doesn't loose you,
3. She has a narcissistic qualities. She can't, and hates to be alone, as soon as she doesn't have anyone, like when she broke up with you, she found someone, and when she asked you to come back, because as said above got nostalgia, but also, didn't like to be alone, she was a alone a second and she couldn't, now that she has you, she wants to do what she does,
4. She has low self esteem, she loves attention, so you will never be happy with her, she will always flirt, look for guys, and cheat on you, 100%. She doesn't love you, period, she doesn't know herself, and doesn't know what she wants, she is mentally and emotionally unstable.
Stop running after her, and she is toxic. OF course, i don't know how your relationship was, how you treated her, how and where you met, how long you were together, and if you are satisfying her in bed. these things matter, but still doesn't excuse her behavior,
If you want advice, healthy thing to do, is break it off, move on, and no matter how many times she will call, contact, be strong don't go back, having the narcissistic personality traits, she will use guilt, and victimization to get you, to get you to feel sorry for her, so she can suck some love out of you, these people are toxic, you will waste your time, and emotions on her, you will be left badly in the end, leave her now while you still can.
Hope this helps, if you want more info, you can answer my questions, or ask more about the situation, ill try to give you advice in depth
hope you do the right thing, what is right for you,