I was dating this girl for 4 years but about 3 months ago I tried breaking up with her. The emphasis on tried, I broke up with her but she took it so badly that to stop her tears I said we could work on the relationship.
Its now at a point where I’m getting feelings for someone else and I can’t carry on pretending that I’m working on the relationship with my ex to be.
I just can’t try again knowing that she’s going to cry because I still see her as one of my best friends and I really don’t want to hurt her.
do you know anyone that likes your current woman. best way to ease out of a relationship is for both partners to find someone new. perhaps you can match up someone new with her. another way is to be mean and demanding with her to the point she reduces her feelings for you to the point dumping will be easier without tears.
other than these options your going have to man up and be aggressive in the need for a change in who you love. the tears will go away in a shorter time than suffering with someone you are no longer romantically stimulated by.
Right now she's with someone who doesn't love her--- don't you think she already knows that ? I bet this is not going to unexpected to her.
Know that she Is going to be upset and she WON'T be a friend anymore, because that's what happens when people break up.
It's too bad that this is because of another person. It would be so much better if you needed to be have some time and space to grow and figure out what you want to do. Take a breather and self-check your needs and actions.
i prefer he selects my first suggestion to hook her up with another guy to ease the break up pain. I think wrong to suppress any options i think of. is his choice to make not mine.
breaking up with someone is never a enjoyable task. i have done it many times and never looked forward to doing it and it never gets better no matter how many times you do it.
but i wish you good luck in attempting to do so.
And your NEW (potential) relationship, is it in-person, or a LDR?
Breaking up is hard to do, but it's done every day. Just start reducing the number of times you talk to her.
I don't think a "I'm no longer interested, but here's another guy for you" ploy is a good idea. It is demeaning and presumptuous and let's her know you don't think she can find another suitable guy herself.
Discussion closed - why not create your own thread?