I’m 18 years old. I briefly tried to live away at college, but missed Home too much so I currently attend a nearby university and live af home.
Due to ongoing family issues (we live on family property and my uncle is psycho), it’s no longer an option for my family to live here. It was a family decision to move. It’s an unsafe, unhappy option for my family to stay. The situation isn’t going to get better and there’s nothing we can do about it. The rental property we own just went under contract. So we put in an offer on a house that we love in the next county. It has plenty of room, isn’t too far from our jobs, my school, or my boyfriend.
Even though it was a family decision, and I KNOW we have to, I’m struggling. I’m a very sentimental person and this is the Home I was raised in. My grandpa gave my parents the land and my dad basically built it himself. There are so many memories and firsts in this house. And we’re about to leave them all behind.
Every ounce of familiarity I had was gone. Not one single aspect (besides my family and boyfriend) are the same as they were 8 months ago. New house, new school, I don’t even drive the same car I had. Everything is changing and I have MAJOR anxiety about it. I know this change is for the better, but it’s hard to leave everything you’ve ever known. Especially when you don’t really have a choice; you were forced out of it because of unfair, selfish, crazy neighbors.
I’m really struggling with this. I’m trying to keep it from my parents because they’re both very upset with the situation too. They built this house together and theyve lived here for 27 years. And now we’re just leaving it.
Any advice for how to deal with this anxiety and fear?
Moving is a MAJOR stressor, so don't think you are alone feeling this way.
Try to make plans. What will your room look like? How can you decorate it so it's wonderful for you? Try to get a girfriend involved to help you. Clean and sort and pick out your colors.
Maybe the entire family can have a pow wow and share anxieties so you can support each other.
You’re right when you say that change can be good. It’s hard to see that when change is thrust upon you and you see it as unfair. You are blessed to have supporting parents and many happy memories of your time together. You have a future with them to look forward too. Change can make us better people. Each situation that is thrust upon us, can help us grow into wiser people too. I’m sure you’ve heard that life is only 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it. Have you tried focusing on all the good things that are going on for you right now? Think about the positive things – loving parents, supportive boyfriend, a school close to home, a car that runs, etc. Also, focus only on the good memories and let the things that hurt you go. Of course, you should always make sure that you’re safe, but don’t let other people’s bad judgements change your attitude about your own life. I believe that if you stay positive, you will have a good life ahead of you. I’d also like to add, that as a former teacher, I am quite impressed with your grammar skills! May God bless you and keep you.