A co-worker's offer
Recently I've been wanting to move into another apartment, but had to put the idea firmly on the back-burner for now. It seems like a slight stretch financially, and something I would need more time to prepare for.
Since then, a co-worker of mine suggested the possibility or me moving in with him in his house. He has some roommates already but could use the extra cash, and knows I'm someone who wants to move.
We are not as close as I am to some of my other friends, though we do seem to have many things in common and I think moving in would give us an opportunity to get to know each other better and become good friends.
I've visited his place a few times before and it is quite nice and spacious. I like going there, and wouldn't mind the space I'd be living in - I'd also have pretty much free reign of the main living space.
The offer has a lot of pros, aside from the start of a great friendship/opportunity to make more friends. It would be cheaper for me each month and give me an opportunity to save money over time. I would be closer to work. I would have a driveway and a parking spot right there, at the front door. And in a way I'd have more privacy than living in my apartment, which has thin walls. It also might help me structure myself better and avoid some of the lazy habits I've picked up living alone.
At the same time, there are cons.
For one, my co-worker doesn't know me real well yet. When he gets to know me better, he might not like me as much. I could end up being a bad or obnoxious house guest, using the shared bathroom too much or making too much noise late at night, or damaging his house on accident. Or just being the "weird guy" who is introverted and doesn't communicate enough with the rest of the household so I'm kind of the despised odd man out.
I'm also worried about privacy, and would feel uncomfortable about doing many day-to-day things there since I would view it as renting space in someone's house - it wouldn't be my own personal space per se. I also wouldn't have a bathroom to myself, which is a luxury I enjoy now. I still wouldn't fully be able to live and breathe like I could in my own house or a nicer apartment, but I could much better than I am now.
While I'm assured I'd be able to drop my things and stay there for a sufficient period of time and save sone cash, I still worry about unforeseen changes. Like what if my coworker meets a girl in the next year or two and wants everyone else to go? Or what if something happens and I get kicked out? It might not be like an apartment where paperwork and typical lease laws come into place - what if I'm entirely at the property owner's mercy? Or, what if I get fired from my job and suddenly don't have as much money to work with paying rent. ...Not that these are looming possibilities right this moment.
I have some other general anxieties, but those are some of my main concerns.
My one friend heard about the offer and told me he thinks I should do it. He knows both me and my co-worker, and sees it as a big win-win for both of us.
For a brief time I lived with roommates, but that situation was quite a bit different and didn't stay that way for too long. But I remember feeling like I made roommates' lives inconvenient sometimes when they needed to do things at certain times. I don't want to feel like that again, and now maybe I'm experienced enough to be a better housemate?
Would like to hear some thoughts on it. I think it can work, I'm just wondering what wisdom ya'll might be able to add to the decision-making process...
You would be renting a room, not building a social life. (Some roomies don't even know each other well and have very separate lives)
Keep this an objective decision. How much power do you place on having to share the bathroom? That would be a deal breaker for me.
I understand your anxieties about living with a work colleague who you don't really know, it's a risk that could go one way or the other. Great, if it all works out and you all get along, like your friend said it would be a win win situation but it would be very hard for you if it didn't go to plan. You are all adults, so hopefully any issues or disagreements would all be dealt with in the correct way.
You don't need to be really good friends with your house mates either, as long as you are friendly and considerate towards them, they should respect you back. It doesn't matter if you consider yourself to be odd or an introvert, you come across as very self aware, so it's doesn't sound like that it something that would become a huge problem.
I lived in a house share for 2 years and in that time people came and went. Some wanted sociable, others wanted to be left alone, and I liked some more then others, it was something I found I had to accept, go along with and that came part in part of living with other people.
Your worries about future situations, I guess you can't stop them from happening but again hopefully it would be done correctly and there would be notice if he needed you to leave. Would of thought youd have to do something really offensive to get kicked out.
If want to see the room you'd be renting again, assuming you've seen it or meet the other house mates again, ask your work colleauge if thats possible to arrange, it might help you make your decision.
There other option is to look into other house shares to compare.