Hard to make friends
I should really see a phychologist
There are days I feel really happy, that nothing can hurt me, but other days I feel like I will never stop feeling hurt.
I don’t belong anywhere- I’ve known that for awhile now
I never had close friends in high school. I did sit with a group of girls but I didn’t have the same interests as them and they didn’t try to get to know me.
At work, the staff are nice but only cause they have to. I haven’t made close friends there either. When I first started there, they invited me to social events, but now they rarely do (except Xmas & New Years Party) and I’m not sure why that happened.
I do have a boyfriend though, it’s bizaree really because I don’t have friends
He included me in his group chat on social media but they don’t talk directly to me as they do with the others. That is understandable as they all have been friends for years and I recently joined but it hurts. One of the girls asked if we would like such & such.. one asked, she answered, I asked , no reply, just a ‘seen’ , until my boyfriend answered instead
Anywhere I go, they all say, “I didn’t think you were interested in that?”
Why do they all assume that? Do I give off that vibe? Is it my expression? I do sometimes roll my eyes accidentally, but I don’t mean it.
I know it might be hard for you guys to give me advice ‘cause you don’t know me personally, but are there any suggestions of why any of this is happening and a way they can stop saying , “I didn’t think you were interested in that?”
Hello SWEETHEART: about this sentence: "I do sometimes roll my eyes accidently, but I don't mean it"- well, if others see you rolling your eyes they don't know that you don't mean it. They can't read your mind.
If there is a way for you to get honest feedback on what you express to others in your body language and in your verbal expressions, if you had a way to view yourself, that will give you lots of information about what it is you communicate to others.
Thank you for your feedback
I have let them know about me accidentally rolling my eyes, I have told them if I ever do it to you, let me know as I definitely would not have meant it
I'm curious, are you able to open up to your boyfriend? And is he able to give you some honest feedback?
You mentioned needing a psychologist: you are not alone! The need for psychologist is on the rise. You mentioned also having this problem in school.
My girls all had the same problem. They considered themselves introverts, and pretty much kept to themselves.
I wish there were elective classes in school where students were taught how to communicate in this generation. Now days, everyone seems to be hiding in their phones/computers. I think we would be surprised how many introvert there are in this generation.
My girls take after their Dad, so this could just be genetic? My oldest daughter is so smart, she can entertain herself and didn't seems to need anyone. It took a lot of effort for her to get into a normal relationship with her boyfriend. But, when she opens up it amazes all of us!
Our second daughter had a learning problem in school and was afraid to open up in fear, her classmates would recognize her struggles. But now, she's a General Manager of a successful company, and all her employees love her.
I know I'm rambling... I just wanted you to know you are normal. Just be open to your friends: and if you show them your weaknesses, they might be happy to help you get over your insecurity?
Best of wishes to my Online friend!