Did I make a mistake having sex with my ex??
Broke up with my ex-boyfriend about six weeks ago and I managed to block his number and email. The truth is that I really missed his touch his love and our fabulous sex life. I decided to sign up for some online dating recently and out of the blue I received a response from the site from my prior boyfriend. I tried to ignore it but one thing led to another and after several days I agreed to meet with him to bring some closure to our relationship since the break up was quite abrupt. I broke up with him after I learned he was lying about his finances again.
He told me in that he has changed fully for the better because of me so I met him and talked myself into cutting my losses and just bringing closure once and for all. I think he had the same idea because that’s the way he sounded at the least initially when we began our conversation. However, we each had one glass of wine and somehow started sharing more emotional hurt that we each shared in the relationship. We also discussed how hard it’s been since we’ve been split. Before I knew it I was at his apartment and we had passionate sex. I also told him I loved him which was unusual for me to say first. Of course, now he wants to permanently reconcile. On the one hand I do love him but even though he is at least paying his bills on time, he has little money saved and he is almost 66.
I also am still somewhat looking on the dating website websites and replying to certain men I’m curious about. Although I know that everybody’s got baggage, what do I do at this point? Do I really trust that he has changed permanently and somehow my anxiety about him having little savings will dissipate over time. The last thing I want to do is hurt my prior boyfriend and I am really concerned about having to get over. We were together 5 years so he has been a part of my life and vice versa. We met when we were both broken emotionally. I had lost my husband and he had served time for a white collar crime and lost all of his assets.
If he is really where your heart lies, why not offer to help him manage his finances. We all need help from time to time and we all have our strenghts and weaknesses.
You could always date for a while and see how it goes, before making anything offical.
I would definatley advise to take things slowly until you figure out if you can trust him and I don't think looking at the dating apps or chatting to other people is a terrible thing to do until you figure out what you really want.
I hope something or anything in that muddle made sense or helped in some little way.
Life is to short to not be happy but its also to short to not take chances.
since you enjoy sex with him i would suggest you tell your ex you are agreeable to dating him but not ready to commit a monogamous relationship with him. you should date other men to see if you can find a more fulfilling experience with a more wealthy intelligent guy that gives you a fabulous sexual experience. this will also provide you the opportunity to observe if your ex has truly changed for the better to your satisfaction
my experience consulting with other girls indicates very few rekindled relationships with an ex last very long. the bitterness of breaking up never goes away and they discover the reason they broke up was from more issues than they previously thought.
So youare feeling like he’s not marriage material - but he’s fun to play with.
So unless you feel that you MUST be married, just enjoy these days. Otherwise, date others until a one worthy of your financial requirements comes along. But it could take a while.
Many men in their 60’s have financial issues. Otherwise, they tend to stay married - because money keeps some marriages together.