GNU - Jun 28 2018 at 22:14
I share a flat with two roommates. I was good friends with one of them before and I knew the other slightly before moving in.
My friend, and now roommate, has a huge need for spending time alone. Before I moved in we saw each other once or twice a week at most but the time we spent together was good quality time. Since I moved in we see each other while eating dinner and such but the quality time we shared before is just not there anymore. I feel like I need to respect her need for alone time otherwise I suspect it would put a strain on our friendship. But I feel as if I have lost something valuable when our opportunities for quality time has mostly disappeared.
I now spend a lot of time with the other roommate so I'm not lonely but I miss the interaction me and my friend had before. It feels like I have to downplay my need for companionship and I have stopped suggesting that we hang out. Instead I wait for her to offer which makes me feel like I have no control over our friendship. This makes me sad and emotional.
I consider several options:
1) Accepting the change in interaction with my friend and hang out with her when she wants companionship.
2) Finding my own place and try to get back to how things were before.
3) Take a step back and make sure that we don't see each other every day. That way she will automatically get more alone time.
4) Try to suggest that we do stuff like we did before in regular intervals and see how that works.