So I had talked to him about us and he said that he loved having me over and that I was his basically hisgirlfriend but until he felt more comfortable he didn't want to announce it just yet. Today after work I was gonna swing by for a minute to bring his book back that he let me borrow, I didn't ask if it was okay first I thought that maybe after he said that it would be okay to do a quick drop off. I was pulling into his apartment complex and I say his ex-girlfriend there taking his dog out to the bathroom. I feel like a fool and I don't know if i should confront him about it or...I don't know I just don't know. Basically ever day for the past month I've been there at his place spending time with him, getting to know him and I just hurt so freaking bad.
Well, he did tell you he wasn’t ready for any commitment.
There may be unfinished business with his ex - or she just visits the dog.
Tell him you saw her walking his dog and want to know what’s up.
(I wonder why you are so hesitant to stand up for your right to know your status with him)
Regardless of the ex factor, this guy is not good for you. You have clearly invested a lot in him, and he's reluctant to reciprocate. If a guy really likes you, nothing can get in his way, and he's excited to make it official. This guy is not boyfriend material.
I know that's painful to think about, but please know this is no reflection on you. Whatever is "holding him back", it will always be there. You'll always want more than he will give, and you'll always be the one sacrificing. And that has nothing to do with you. But if you keep pursuing him, your life will be consumed by his shortcomings.
You need to move on. Better now, than spending any more time chasing someone unwilling or unable to commit.