Husband of 3 years will not stop SCREAMING at me and that’s not all - advice please?
So I have been divorced from the father of my only child, he was actually abusive in every sense of the term and that may play into my current challenge with my marriage now. My current husband and I have been married for a little over 3 years and literally since the day after we got married it feels like a downward spiral getting worse and worse and now it’s just too much! When he gets mad he gets MAD yells and screams and I will not tolerate that around my daughter and when she is at her dads I just cannot understand why he yells so loud, and calls me horrible names and literally it could be over because he thinks I rolled my eyes, or because I said “see ya” instead of “bye” one time (true story). We are ADULTS AND LIFE IS WAYYYY TOO SHORT in my opinion to take every little thing soooo seriously!? I’m not trying to put him down in any way but he calls me a child and I don’t get so easily worked up over things. He has also 100% completely stoped acting affectionately toward me whatsoever and he has never once apologized or taken responsibility / felt remorseful for some of the truly hateful things he has said/screamed and done. I am at a place of major bewilderment because my first divorce my daughter wasn’t even 1 now she is 7 this would change her and she will/would remember. I’m not jumping straight to the big D just thought I’d get it out there. Any opinions? Regarding the disrespect then demanding it from me like a child, he cannot apologize yet demands me to, and the affection thing... cheating? I’m baffled clearly and would so appreciate any thoughts!? Thank you so so much!
First of all, I’d like to commend you for being willing to work on your marriage. There are many people who would just run for the nearest lawyer. It’s great also that you are concerned about your daughter and how all of this is effecting her. I’m sure there are many answers by people out there – like seeing a counselor, confronting him about this and having him talk about it, etc.
My advice is to pray for your husband. I don’t know what your beliefs are. I am a Christian and I know that my creator understands my problems and wants to help me solve them. Pray that your husband’s heart would soften towards you. Pray that his anger would end and that whatever is truly bothering him will come to light. Pray that he loves only you and will learn to show you that love. Also, pray that you may see ways that you can change to help him through this.
On this end, I will be pray that you and your husband can work this all out!