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Have not been in this situation... need help!

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Relationship advice Hi!

This will be a lot to read so I appreciate if you could take your time and read everything. To make it easier the girl I'm dating is Kriss. The guy you are going to read about is Tobbe and the girl who hosted the party is Julia.

I have been dating this girl since the start of 2018. She is 17 and will be 18 in a few weeks, while I am 22 years old. Most of my friends give me hate because I should not date a younger woman. All I ask for is help and not hate. It is two things that are bothering me.

She invited me to a party, but I told her I would be late cause I had other things to do. So while I was busy doing other things she sends me a video on snapchat of her playing with tobbe's hair. For me that was not okay. Imagine If I wasn't there she could have slept with him or if not being intimate. She even said that she once slept with him at a party hosted by Julia. (She ment a party that was a while ago, not the party that was last night.) so clearly Julia had hosted a lot of parties.

Now when the party was over everyone went to bed and I slept besides Kriss. Kriss was stroking me by my arm, and wanted me often by her side. I did not make a move or take her clothes off it just got intimate. So in the morning she used her foot to push me aside which I take it as I was too close on her or that she didn't feel comfortable with me.

Here is what I'm thinking. She might test me of how far she can go before making me jealous. And are Tobbe still having sex with Kriss? Why are Kriss acting like that now when she was not like this before?

Also It could be just me overthinking because we're not sure if Tobbe and Kriss is still sleeping together and maybe them playing with each others hair is a friend thing. I won't jump to conclussion too fast.

One thing is for sure... I will not say sorry because then I come across as too insecure and that turns her off. Do you have any advice on what I could do?

Have not been in this situation... need help!

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I think that when you had “other things to do” she didn’t like that and so she punished/ teased you all evening.

But that’s what 17 year old girls do.

Have not been in this situation... need help!

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Yeah but she's not showing me respect by sending me provocative snaps like her playing with that guys hair. And it was just me overthinking because it could not be possible for them to have sex. She is 17 and he is 18.

And If I am a mature man I say sorry but it's too late now and she would think I'm weird that I still talk about the party that was a week ago. I also come across as insecure if I say sorry.

But what should I say sorry for? sorry for being intimate in bed?

Have not been in this situation... need help!

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Hello ANTARES1,

what I don't get is if she's mad at you. Looks like it was a particular situation. It's in the past now. Why keep crying over spilled milk?

If right now you 2 are OK, so be it.

If you feel to uncomfortable, then talk about it.

Good luck.

Have not been in this situation... need help!

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Is there is clear understanding about what “dating” for this amounnt of time means? Like you are exclusive to each other now, monogamous? - is this clear to her? If not, then perhaps you need a heart to heart talk and set things straight.

She is young and may not want to be tied down now. But she owes you an explnation about how she feels about your relationship.

This thread has expired - why not start your own?

B-1