Feeling guilty about cutting someone out of my life
SRE12 - Nov 12 2018 at 12:28
I'm in such a dilemma. I was in a relationship with someone who had been my best friend for years. We were really close and I fell in love. However, about a year ago she ended it and I was heartbroken, but we remained friends. She's in a relationship now and is planning on having a baby soon. But she still wants me to go round and see her and still be friends, but I just feel weird about it all, probably a sign that I haven't moved on from it. I aired these views to her but she seemed to get really offended that I felt that way.
I feel like I need to move on with my life but I also feel guilty over it. We have known each other since we were kids but I honestly feel it will be too painful to continue being in contact with her. Any advice as to how I should approach it?
Thanks in advance.
I would agree with your opinion that you have not been full able to move on. I also think it might be hard to see her with someone else. One thing I have learned coming from a long term relationship and now we are friends is that it is better than nothing. As bad as that may sound we both know it is for the best and I know that If I ever get back with her it won't be good for both our sake. It doesn't mean I don't miss her in that type of relationship but I had to keep my head up and move forward.
I wish you the best of luck stay strong and I think she really is counting on you to do the right thing I wouldn't try to light a fire or ruin this moment for her
It's not about what she wants, it about you and who you chose to be in your life. Friendships do change over time; If you want to move on and maintain a distance type of friendship it's really OK. I have two close friends who I may not see or speak to for months; yet when we do get together it's like it we pick up where we left off. no resentment, no why haven't called, it just real good talk...
I would give yourself time and space. Keep away or keep to minimal contact with this lady. Time will help although you may never stop having feelings for her. You need to get the feelings to a place where you can manage them and be in control.
From time to time I see someone I had a very intense relationship with over 20 years ago. I still care for him but we are friends and both have new relationships.
You will get there. Be patient. And remember it's what you feel. She has her new life and baby