Days ago I felt so good with my husband but I can’t figure out what’s got me so confused. I feel like I’m searching for this appraisal from my lover because I’ve never reeeeally been with anyone else... maybe it’s just the danger and passion ive never felt. I want to message him and see him but I know it’s so wrong. I really do love my husband but I can’t help but feel this isn’t normal. We were so good a few days prior to him coming back. This lover is just so persistent and passionate so it was hard for me as I was always kind of curious as to what someone else would be like. I don’t have anything deeper with him as I know deep down I would never want anything more from him.
Where do I go from here? I know I need to cut ties but I don’t know why that’s so hard. I wish I never would have started it in the first place.
If you want to continue the affair, you need to end the marriage. Now. If you want to stay married, end the affair. For good. At the very least, you need to tell your husband what you've been doing. At least stop letting him believe you've been faithful. At least then he could make an informed decision for himself. And you'd likely be free to do as you wish without it desteoying the person you say you love.