Every second I do regret my marriage.In Fact, the worst decision in my life.First of all we came to know him through matrimony his parents came to see me, said he was working in abroad and earning and myself can immediately find a job there.They seemed very well behaved. I liked him and his family.We not met but we got engaged.They said yes immediately as my In laws thought they had no chance of finding a better girl for their below average looking son.From childhood, like all girls I have dreamt a lot about my life partner and the life after my wedding.But few weeks before we engaged i searched his profile in social network it was big shock “he is BALD” i am really disappointed and i told that matter to my mom so she called his father and she making an innuendo about that issue but his father hides the original matter.After some days my husband relieved that thing and he excused me to hide that and he compromised me but telling many cinematic stories so I believed him blindly and i forgive him then started to love him madly.After this all things happened that day comes my parents almost spent around 6 lakhs on my marriage(including jewels and other expenses)but after that day I am dependent on him for every penny.During engagement ceremony he behaves very differently he didn’t show any interest in me the next day(marriage)within few hours he knotted he go alone to his room and i am waiting for him in stage he never came back so I went to my room and started crying my family members tried to convince me they said that things will change after some days.After that all arrangements was done for our first night but when I entered in to the room he suddenly get up from bed and told me to sleep alone then he went with his sister that time i am really worried(but now a days when I reminded that I don’t know how it possible without their family members knowledge? Is it okay to do such things in first night? So for him the girl who comes to live with him is not important then his sister right? He is not worried about his life he not yet started? Ohh god) it happened for almost 4 days after that he told me that his sister loves someone’s she wants his help so I leave that matter in that time itself.(but it was the first mistake i did afterwards i realize) After some days left he planned for a honeymoon in nearby hill station on the way from i can definitely sense a change in his behaviour.He seemed very uninterested towards me.I am traveling with my partner for life, but because of his behaviour I felt lonely and started missing my home.Then we checked in the resort and refreshed we are in bed that time he started a little romantic play and told me one thing that now he don’t want to sex with me because of it if I conceived earlier his sister in law will be worried(his elder brother have no kids yet because they first want to enjoy their life he loves his wife very much he did whatever he wants and for all for her happiness only and he never make her to feel alone and he always with her not even let her alone with his own family members) so I cried inside and leave that matter as usual.But at that time also he spent most time to speaks with his sister.Then after some days he go back abroad and booked tickets for me and his parents after 3 months.That three months without him in his house was very bad experience for me his parents treated me like unwanted person for them his mother directly told me to go to my house and to come back 2 days before our travel day so i followed her words.Four months after our marriage i am eagerly went abroad to see my husband in airport he comes with his original bald head he looks very old and thin like HIV affected person.but I always said myself to be positive and look into the positive side of him.But there my in-laws never leave us alone for a moment and we have yet to have our “special” moments.After he went to office they behaved strangely they always saw some specific Tv programs but even though i am not interested to watch them but just to mingle with them i go to hall but his father suddenly have a remote in his hand and changing the channels and his mother switch off the tv or suddenly leave from that place so i calms myself it’s okay all happened for good things.After that they always talk with their son and daughter in phone and no one wants to talk with me sometimes if i wanted them to talk with my parents they refused so like that days going.After the days going we all went for some trips, in that i am little bit happy and satisfied because of him.he showed his love for me but he doesn't initiate sex and never behaves romantically towards me. I used to literally beg him to be affectionate towards me but he used to deny saying he's tired or not in the mood.As usual all girl’s mother my mother also started to inquire me about my marriage life and child so i told him about it and we come to the decision to go to doctor but after all checkups doctor said nothing is problem in us(physically) so he advice as to try for another 6 months so it goes like that every night i already mentioned above.I am middle class girl who was always taught the value of money.But he loves spending money and never saves.For me,i scared about future and I always advise him to save. But he spends excess money on the most unwanted things. Moreover, he spends more for his friends & family.Most of the time I feel that those peoples are just taking advantage of him.We both think very differently on various aspects of life and sometimes, this causes friction and anger.I am not allowed to sit beside him when we go for family outings. It is always his father who sits beside him In the car.And some months later they start blaming about me to my parents and his father starting blaming about my parents to his and our relatives.And they also spread many rumors about myself and my family.Time broken my patience so we went to doctor again for the child doctor told him she have no problems so I want to check your reports after that we will decide what to do.But after hearing his words he come home and started scolding me how you want me to do this i know i have no problem with me but after a long argument he calmed and agreed for the test and he did.After the all our both reports are good without any complications so doctor give us some medication and give the specific date for intercourse but it was also not give us good solution but after some months by god's grace i am pregnant.But the real problem arises from only after my pregnancy announcement their parents are not fully satisfied because they worried about his elder son and his daughter whenever I phoned my mother in law she never talked with me in good words he always enquiries about baby and his son what I cooked like this and cut the call.And whenever i called her sister she never picked the call she always said she was busy in his works but daily she spent roughly 2 hours with my husband in phone but I don’t know what they speaks he always locked room or go to nearby park spoke with her and come back he never share me what they talk if I asked him he simply told it's our personal It's not your job(??!)And he never like to ask how my health is what I want now.But my main question is why his sister behaved with me like this? Most time she shows me “he is my brother he give first preference to myself only u will never break our relationship she shows her irritated face when he was with me,And after I got pregnant she totally avoided to speak with me she always have great friendship with her first sister in law they behave like twin sisters but his sister gossiping about his first twin sister
with my husband when she was not there(I am really wondering about her how she was like that?)But my husband always told me his sister is very good girl in this world for him and he has a habit of admired other girls(Especially his sister and sister in law) he openly compliment about them(mostly physical structure) and it makes me insecure,uncomfortable and sad.He always sees me as is a friendless housewife who is lost, lonely and aimless.I am good looking girl but he always compared me with them and cheated me by my appearance(I am 58kg and 155cm fair girl). And just 6 months before I give birth to a girl child but the real tragedy in my life starts here.His family members decide to deliver our baby in abroad where(I am now)(at first I think we both decided it but afterwards only I came to know that this all are his family members wish) they badly fight with my parents and booked tickets for them.When I was 8 months old he leave me alone in Germany and went to India without any hesitation in his heart.Two weeks before my delivery his parents came here and refused to see my face and never talk with me but they acts very well.And after delivery they want to play with my kid not even ask about my health my husband just they my daughter to their room when she cries he took her to me that’s all I am very weak physically and mentally but no one noticed me they think only food is enough for me I always sit alone in my bed room but they enjoyed well by watching Tv eat special foods and going to restaurant holy & tourist places & shopping they don’t want myself and my kid to take with them they always left us alone at home and not even call me and returned very late to home.But they blaming me in phone calls that I am always in my room and not even go to kitchen and cook she i am already very injured by giving birth and that time I gave pumped milk of me to my baby every 3 hours it’s a very terrible process.Days gone and the time for my parents visit.This is the Time god gave a chance to realize about my husband real behavior. He treat my parents as his slave.Like a servent he makes my father to work for him in all household things and he always cheated my mother by his behavior and words.Both are really hurted and afraid for him they wakeup in morning very early to prepare food for him but he always blaming about it.
He is the one who blamed and damaged my whole family members with his words and behavior but I don’t know still why I am quite like this? Sometimes i want to kill him but what to do? Why this type of men’s want Marriage ? If they want to give preference only his family members and want to spent and love them why they spoiled another girl life? Why they will started to behave like a normal human? Please give me any solution!
This is a sad story for you.You are in an abusive situation.
What do THEY (him and his family) get out of this relationship? What is the advantage of this marriage for THEM?
Were you used to be a cover for a relationship between him and a forbidden relative? His homosexuality? Did they need your dowery?
There must be some benefit to all of them to keeping this marriage. What do you think it is?
Do you have a religious counselor or other relative that you can talk to?
Yah sometimes he also told me i have to talk with your all relatives about your behavior.And I also agreed but not yet he started