Father refuses to accept my mixed race boyfriend but wants to see our baby...
HATTY.T - Feb 11 2019 at 14:29
My dad will not accept my mixed race boyfriend purely based on race. He says he will be "civil but don't have to accept him" and i don't think thats good enough.
We've recently had a baby and he wants to meet her. I feel by not accepting my bf he doesn't accept half of my baby. I've made it clear that unless he accepts my bf he won't be seeing her. I wouldn't be setting a very good example to our daughter if i allowed them to have a relationship?
He has several step grandchildren through his new wife and they all call him granddad. It hurts to see photos of him posing with new babies that his step daughter in law has posted on Facebook captioned "nanny and granddad." It was his birthday recently and i decided not to wish him happy birthday and again photos posted with comments "had to see grandad for his birthday" which i felt may of been a dig, especially as I noticed that my dads wife and step daughter in law have completely stopped liking/commenting on any photos i post of my baby. (Maybe over thinking)
I had a good relationship with his wife and we used to meet for lunches. She even tried to smooth things over with my dad while I was pregnant and seemed to be on my side. When baby was born she was super keen to meet her. Then once i had recovered i said she could meet her and she said "thats not a good idea" and ive not really heard much from her since.
its a tricky one.as I completely understand where your coming from. It shouldn't be about where your from or what you look like. This should be about the love you have for each other and for your baby. I can't tell you what to do but I would talk to him about it and explain that if it is about his color then he won't be accepting part of your child. He will miss out big time on seeing his grandchild grow up. See what he has to say. He doesn't have to be best friends with him but polite and civil.
My parents and family don't really like my partner. We have a child together and they wish I was not with him. I told them that th need to accept my choices as they make me happy. Now they seem to try and include him in things.
Not sure if I was much help but I hope things work out for you. X