Love Match Calculator

Why can't I find a decent man?

Posted by
JOANNE5057 (alias modified to protect identity)
on Apr 13 2019 at 13:33
Member since: 25 January 2017
Relationship advice I was in a friends with benefits for 3 years, which suited me at the time, but i ended it in February as i wanted a proper relationship. I joined a Online Dating site and within a couple of days, Bob messaged me. He seemed very nice and genuine, and after a week we spoke on the phone. He's a nurse, with a 15 year old son who lives with him.He was very full on and 2 weeks after first contact, we met. He talked a lot and we seemed to get on, so we met again 2 days later, he told me the life story of his son's mother and talked non stop for hours!i thought it was early days and it would get better! 2 days later i went to his house, he lives an 1 hour away,we had sex, although not particularly good i thought it would improve, despite his smallness! He would call me everyday to tell me about HIS news!He then said he noticed i was a few pounds overweight and was obese, i'm uk size 14!The following week he came to my flat, we stayed in, where again he talked at me!Again we had sex, the next morning he went quiet on me and then text me to ask if i was pregnant, i'm 56 and post menopause, i couldn't believe it from a nurse.So i finished with him, he didn't like this and said he would contact me in 5 days to talk. We talked and decided to give things another go, but i needed to support him etc. He has 4 houses and the wall fell down on one of them and he had problems with his son, he constantly moaned about his shit life!We didn't see each other for 4 weeks, then i went to his house on Thurs, met his son and went for a curry.He told me again about his son's mum's life again, despite me trying to change the subject several times, this went on for an hour. Eventually i asked him why he was obsessed with his ex and that i didn't to know about it again, i don't discuss my exes! he said he wasn't and that i didn't know him at all and we weren't getting on and did i want to leave? we went outside and he told me he'd had enough of my temper as this was the second time, i suggested we talk things over but he said no, and that he could tell by my face i wasn't happy! if i'd lost my temper i would have walked away and not spoken to him! I'm at a loss, in a text yesterday he mentioned my quick temper and how shit his life was!He has his health, job, money and family and 4 houses!i did point this out to him in my reply and have not heard from him since!Why am i so upset and feel a complete failure, i tried so hard with him!I dressed the way he liked, listened to him, even tried to lose weight, yet part of me thinks i'm well rid of him and i would have been so miserable?
Why can't I find a decent man?
Reply from
SUSIEDQQ
on Apr 14 2019 at 15:53
Member since: 27 December 2013
Some people don’t like to be confronted about their rude or inappropriate behavior. If you gently told him that you didn’t think the topic of his ex was appropriate, and he kept it up, then there’s your answer. He wants to do what he wants to do: dump his sad story on a trapped listener.
Why can't I find a decent man?
Reply from
JOANNE5057 (alias modified to protect identity)
on Apr 21 2019 at 18:36
Member since: 25 January 2017
Thank u, it was not even about their relationship, but her relationship with her ex husband!he's been in contact and says that I'm in a bad place, I'm really not! I think I was upset because the honeymoon period was over so quick and I've never got on so badly with someone at the beginning of a relationship, we just didn't click!now I think I've had a lucky escape and could see why every woman had dumped or left him for someone else!
Why can't I find a decent man?
Reply from
ALTREAL
on Apr 22 2019 at 09:52
Member since: 20 August 2015
Maybe this isn't about you, but about your ex. There is nothing wrong with this, she gets what she wants, you'll eventually find what you want.

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