Follow heart or head
GEMIMA - May 17 2019 at 07:11
Hello. I am desperately seeking outsider opinions on our problem...
My partner and I have been together for 17 years now and have two amazing teenagers together. We live a humble lifestyle given the economic situation and are just about getting by.
We both work full time with respectable wages but still have found ourselves in debt which we are struggling to get out of. This is the biggest factor with regards to my mental state.
My partner is the main wage earner but he has been desperately unhappy in his job due to management having unrealistic expectations on their staff and make everyone feel undervalued, incompetent, and over worked without pay. The are greedy fat cats really.
My partner has been looking for another job and has been offered one which would appear (on the surface) that he would really get huge job satisfaction from and take great pride in. The problem is this.....
He would have to take a huge pay cut initially at this new job. They promise that it will go up but have not specified any time scale for that. The other worrying factor is that it is also more like seasonal work where he could potentially loose a lot of hours. They say that they really are needing someone of his skill set to benefit their business and he will be used elsewhere too but they cannot guarantee this. He verbally told his current boss about the new job and he has offered him more money to stay on, quite a lot actually which would really help our struggling family. He is so torn. Does he stay in a job where he is belittled and has no job satisfaction for the sake of paying the bills, or does he follow his heart and take a leap of faith in the new job where he will be happier but we will undoubtedly struggle financially, but live in hope that he can prove himself to up his wage in the long run.
I would be so grateful for any advice.
Thank you xxx
I was in the same situation. But what u have to think about is health. I would rather struggle but be more happy doing a job I enjoy. I walked out of a job I was in for 11years. It made me so ill. I took a year out doing a lighter type of job. Less pay, we struggled, but we didn't starve. I then looked into a simular company. If u partner health begins to suffer. He may not be able to work and earn. Then that job that's available now. Might never come up again. This is my opinion, but I truly hope things work.
Being in a job that makes you happy should be foremost. I've had the same experience with my husband. He hates his job, has worked there for 15 years now and is miserable. His work problems have even spilled into our marriage and he's stressed and moody most of the time and takes his frustration out on me and the kids. I would say let your partner follow his heart.
I would say he should take the job in which makes him happy. At the moment I am unemployed, I left a job in which I was very miserable in, that was a year ago. I have had 5 jobs since and each one I have disliked and just cannot seem to find the one for me. But I have been so happy since I left the job I initially did not like. Yes it is a struggle each month for money, but the bills have been getting paid and the mortgage is still going down, we are not starving and we still go on nice days out every so often. It is just about sitting down and looking where all of your outgoings are actually going. We did not realise how much we were actually spending on stuff we did not need or on take away's every week and things like that. I think both of you need to sit down and talk about it, see where you can cut your spending and save money. Look at all your bills and see what can be reduced and after that I definitely feel like you will be ok.
So either he stays in a shitty job he dislikes
Or he gets a new job where they"need" him but don't make any promises whatsoever
And this are the only two options for his rare skillset?