In love with my professor after my bf beat me up
My bf of 5 years ( also my best friend ) who loved me madly hit me very badly during our last fight because I refused to be romantic with him in car. Previously he had trust issues with me as I used to have a crush on a guy but never had been physically involved with him (one sided crush).
After our last fight in which he hit me so hard that my body had marks of it,my heart just broke of from him.I admit that before that day one or two times I had slapped him during fight but it never had any mark on his body.But during this fight he hit me so hard that I fell on glass window of car then was deeply hurt had to get an arms xray from lab because it swelled and had huge spot mark on my arm of someone beating me up. I hid all this from my family because I didn't want them to get hurt because of his mad behaviour.He was the one who had been financially supporting me in all these years after my fathers death.After this event I got so upset that we didn't talk from last 3 months. He even stopped talking and sending me pocket money.During the night when he raised Hand on me I became angry and said that I love my crush (which was not true,just said to hurt him) he beated me more.
3 months we didn't talk and he didn't contact. One of our mutual friends said to him that she will never forgive u now,to which he responded "its alright"
In these three months in which we didn't talk my research supervisor started liking me he is a divorced person whose one kid lives with his first wife.He is single now and is searching for a mate and seems interested in marrying me.During a seminar a new borne baby was crying. my teacher just hinted at me with a smile.In eastern culture babies are borne after marriage so his hint seemed like a marriage thing to me.He frequently give shy smiles to me and dresses up for me and shows me his interest.I have to admit that I am deeply attracted to him emotionally and sexually.I never had sex in my life but I am so drawn to him that I feel I should marry him.But I also get afraid that may be this is infatuation and when heat of the moment will disappear,I will realize that I not only lost my bf but my best friend of 5 years.
My question to all of you is :Should I marry my professor who is 15 years older than me whom I am deeply attracted to ? Or should I wait for my bf of 5 years and ask him to take batterment/counselling classes so that he never hit me again.?
As I told I am deeply attracted towards my professor,the other option is my bf of 5 years.
Noone else than these two are NY marriage considerations right now..Proff is indirectly telling me that he will go abroad for 1 or 2 semesters so that I make a leap towards him earlier but I am confused that should I take decision so hastly.
I have said to my bf that relationship is over. He apologized to me for beating me up but I didn't accept. He said block me from all social media websites ,first I said no but then I blocked him from all social media platforms.
Would appreciate any response from u people?