My boyfriend and I have been together for about 5 years. A couple years ago he cheated on me with a mutual friend, we’ll call her Emily. While sleeping with my boyfriend, Emily continued to pretend to be my friend. We moved passed it because he was young and it was a mistake. Emily was out of the picture for a couple years.
He still has some friends from the friend group but recently Emily has been trying to come back in the picture. We have been fighting recently about it because it makes me uncomfortable and it’s really hurtful to me. Im fine with him hanging out with the old friend group as long as Emily isn’t there. He says I’m being controlling by saying that and by not wanting Emily around. I have expressed how much the cheating hurt me. I’m so hurt and he is so set on me changing my mind about Emily’s involvement in his social life that we are at the point of discussing breaking up.
I love him and I don’t know what to do. Am I being unreasonable? Is this a sign he might not love me like he used to? Help
No, you're not over reacting at all. you were hurt by both your bf and Emily and you’ve been rebuilding your relationship back up with bf. Now it probably feels like your relationship being threatened.
I don’t see how he can say you’re controlling, you obviously just don’t want to get hurt again. you’re going to be extra protective of your feelings.
It sounds like his ties to emily were never completely cut because of his friends and you’d think (if he has changed) he’d do everything to avoid her.
I’m not too sure I buy this ‘she’s trying to get back into the friendship group’, I’m thinking she is in it already. Maybe she never even left it! (Unless you know for sure). Why is he so set on having her back?
Hard to advice you what to do, because if I was in your shoes I’d be feeling the same. keep updating this thread if you to. It will be a good outlet for you
You need to pay attention to this incident.
It reveals much about your BF and how he is (and will) behave in the future: discounting your feelings; surrounding himself with the characters from the past; insisting on bringing up a very hurtful history for you but a sneaky, irresponsible time for him. He’s using her to get his way and show his power in your relationship.
He’s disrespectful. This is how he will be in the future.
Give him his walking papers.