When and how do I ask my boyfriend about finances?
I've been really burnt before and totally misled when I was with a prior boyfriend - in particular, he wanted to build a future with me and because we are older, I told him I needed to know he can stand on his own 2 feet financially, like me. I am not interested in supporting someone through their retirement nor do I have sufficient funds to pay for 2 people. He lied to me throughout the relationship about his money issues to mislead me into believing he was in good shape.
I ended the relationship and now have started a new one. This person is a professional like me, and has his own home. But I believe he pays alimony to the ex; the children are grown and on their own. He wants to discuss a future with me too but I can't even think about that until I know more about his finances as well. Essentially, does he have enough money for his retirement to enjoy life like me; how long does he have to work, etc.
When is the right time to ask these questions. Honestly, I don't want to waste any time .
Your story sounds SO familiar so I will repeat:
A man’s financial profile seems to be important to you so ...
You need to find a relationship with a wealthier man - so you don’t question whether or not he will be a financial burden on you later.
Hire a private detective, if you must, since all you have is a visual life style to depend on right now. Or hire a match service to find someone who fits your needs.