Am I being used for money?
Met someone online and we have been seeing each other for 4 months. He claims to be totally in love with me and wants to make our relationship "permanent". He is almost 70 yrs old and I'm 61 yrs old. However, there's something I feel like it's weird, which concerns his behavior about money.
Call me crazy but...
He seems to rely on me to buy things and either says he'll share the cost or doesn't offer at all. First, let me say that when he visits on most weekends, he brings wines for us to dine with and almost always pays for our meals out. He also gave my kids 2 modest holiday gifts and gave me something decent (but not over the top by any means). He did pay for groceries for a family holiday dinner (with both families).
He is a professional and has no responsibilities but himself - he owns an older car but has a decent home, etc. But he regularly shops at Marshall's and places like that for all items (household and clothing). I have yet to see him wear something not from Marshall's except for his watch which is nice.
Some examples: I have a family event and he has yet to offer any monetary contribution at all even though we are extending our stay to see some of his folks and it will be an expensive trip b/c of the flights, hotels, cars, etc. and he wants me to buy his kids' holiday gifts and he'll pay 1/2 but I feel like i won't see that either. I know he isn't good on the computer to buy things online, but really?
I brought up money a month ago before any trip, etc. and said i thought it was fair if we each paid 1/2 and he was fine with that and even said "or I (meaning him) can pay for it all". But nothing so far at all. He said he had savings for retirement but also said "I (meaning me) have a lot more money than him" - not sure exactly how he knows that other than I do have a new car and a much bigger home, but still....
I'm not even sure what to say or if I am making something out of nothing or not?
Why do you keep dating guys who don’t have the lifestyle you want or expect?
Sharpen your man-search skills, dear.
So this is all purely materialistic. That's very shallow of you. He doesn't wear designer clothes and doesn't drive a sports car, so what? He contributes as much as he can but that's not enough for you. He is a content man, comfortable in his ways. What do you want exactly? He buys your children gifts but you're not even happy with what he buys, even though its the thought that counts. You should start counting your blessings instead of being do ungrateful.