Been married 24 years together 28 and got 3 kids together. I met my husband through a dating agency and back then, in the 9os it was abit embarrassing to say you met someone that way and and not at a club. its not like it is now a days where most people meet through a dating site and is classed as normal. I always thought my husband met his ex girlfriends at a club but I only found out recently from him that he met them the same way as me except one where he met her at work. he used to say to me, the way we met like it was really bad yet all along he met his ex girl friends this way but never told me. I felt like I was made to feel ashamed the way we met and I used to say, at least we have lasted longer then your other exs did but he never said a word. I feel hurt and he always says I go on about his exs but I just wanted to know how long the relationships lasted for. he as never asked me about mine. he said it as nothing to do with him and me now but why hadn't he asked just to see how long mine lasted etc? one of his exs I met years ago when I was young. I used to go to her house because she had a sister who was best friends with my sister and he went with this girl for a few months and he knows now that i met her because i told him and I cannot believe that I used to go to her house and to know my husband slepted with her. it was before I met him but it stays in my head seeing them together and thinking, why me. why did I have to meet someone who went out with someone my sister knew. ive tried to put it at the back of my mind but its hard sometimes to forget.
After 24 years, why are you going back to when he was single and didn’t even know you?
Your anxiety is not about this issue.
Find a counselor to talk about this marriage as it is now and why you are feeling this way.
Good luck and find happiness in the present day.