In the last month she has split with her husband. This was fine and I helped her through it, i was looking forward to her being out of the toxic relationship she was in and move on......the problem is she is starting to. There is a guy she’s starting a new online relationship with, she talked about it to me as I’m her best friend and it hurt. Physically hurt, made me shake with pain. So much so after a week I had to tell her!
I don’t want to hurt anyone in my family, but that is the only reason I can think not to go to her!! I’m not sure she wants me anymore anyway!!
What do I do?
You never mentioned why you are unhappy in your marriage. Marriage is a commitment and a promise and takes almost all our energy to make it successful. Is it possible your energy, that should have been put into your marriage, was spent in your excitement of exploring someone new and mysterious? That is a temptation that many of us fall into. You know, "The grass is always greener.........". or in this case, "The sex is new and exciting, and my wife is _________ " (fill in the blank).
But let's talk about what you have done right. Your marriage may be boring (or worse) right now, but you recognize the importance of the family and the children's need for both parents being at home. That is noble and good. You are also willing to "help" someone that was depressed and having her own family issues. That is noble and good, also. However, that selflessness may have become selfish.
So let's summarize. You became distracted in your marriage and that allowed you to lose sight of your promise you made to your wife, family, and God. However, and interestingly, this distraction (on line relationship) and threat to your family, seemed to self correct when your friend left her abusive relationship and found someone new other then you. So when you see things in that light, what do you think you should do?
Let us know what you decide.