Torn between family and 2nd wife
I'm torn between seeing my family and hurting my wife.
This is my 2nd marriage and we blended a family of 6. 5 girls and a boy. It was difficult from the beginning. We have been married for 8 yrs.
A few.years back we split up for a while, the stress of losing our jobs and living w her mom and the stress of the kids.
We got back together and that's when my family my wife and myself started having serious problems.
Now I want to reconnect with my family and everybody involved had some blame in the game. However I feel that if I do, I cant bring my wife with me, and she wouldn't want to anyway.
I believe she would be hurt If i went and spent time with my sister and her family. My sister was a large reason for the separation from all of my family.
My wife is constantly making rude comments about her, which makes me angry. I dont say anything about it, I just let it go.
So what is your thoughts on this??
I feel your first loyalty should be to your wife. But she should also stop commenting about your family.
I don't know what happened but sit down with your wife and talk it through. Tell her you love her and it hurts you when she bad mouths your family. See how she feels about you contacting your family. If she agrees then have the same conversation with your family (without your wife). Explain that if they can't get along then they will lose you in their life.
You have kids to consider here and they and your wife and marriage should be the priority
HI Confused. Thanks, for sharing.
I am going support some of what Christy has shared, and more importantly, what you may already feel. However, I am a little "fuzzy" on some details. What family would you like to reconnect with of which your wife would be opposed; your first wife's family, your original family (including your sister, parents, other siblings), or your new extended family which includes your wife's children? Perhaps this does not matter if you take the advice of Christy. You made a promise to your wife when you married her....for better or worse, etc. I don't believe your family was in any of the vows (promises), were they?
Let us know how this turns out.