I'm so confused about my family. Growing up they were around for minor events like parties, but no one took a real interest in me or my siblings. My father was absent and my mother wasn't around much either.
By the time I was 16 it was becoming clear that my parents didn't want to deal with me. A few years later my father walked me out of the house and said he was no longer my father. I was homeless and I worked a way onto my feet but learned later that my siblings had also been pretty much given up on, apart from one they chose as a favourite. We were left in a strange town with nowhere to go, we were left with NOTHING.
I tried patching things up with my extended family gave up with them, as an adult they never contacted me once, and if I tried contacting them they were rude and resistant. Even through corona there's been no contact, there has been no point really.
I've never understood why my family didn't want to know me. I understand what happened with my immediate family, it has been completely torn apart by my parents, they split up and fought over us but refused to take any responsibility. But my extended family, my uncles, aunties etc. have made it clear they don't want to know me and never explained why.
Without a reason thinking about them is embarrassing. I did not choose this and did nothing to deserve this. They have made that choice, I just want to know why.
Do you really want to know? Sometimes adults are just fearful that you just reach them for help and they have to say no.
The thing is, probably your parents also didn't help in the inclusion with other members of the family. So for them you are just a complete stranger.
Whatever you think you need to know about this. Just don't. No one deserves this. They don't need you, so why need them?
Family can be anyone. Anyone that we care about.
You don't need that explanation. You just need to get over the past. They don't deserve you in their life.
Don't seek an answer that you will never obtain. Seek a better future with better people in your life and preserve it.