Interested or move on?
HOOPS55 - Jul 6 2020 at 01:18
I work with a guy and for the past year I've had a crush on him. He is always at my desk, he comes and eats by me, works by me, sits in silence with me, we talk about our personal lives etc. Everyone in the office thinks we're secretly dating or into one another. He joined my kickball team last year, where he knew no one (he didn't talk much to anyone besides me) and he is joining a different team with me and my friends this year. At work he finds reasons to be by me or my desk. I constantly catch him staring at me, a lot. Anytime another guy is talking to me or a guy is brought up, he inserts himself into the conversation or stares from a distance. When he moved departments and had to clean out his desk, all the insides jokes I had placed on his desk he took home with him instead of just throwing them away.
Whatever this friendship-thing we have is completely effortless and we have so much fun together, even when we're arguing. I've subtly tried to ask him to hang out in group settings by giving open invitations, no commitment, but he usually doesn't show (I don't ask why I just let it go). I know he cares and likes me to some degree but I understand we work together and that's messy. I don't want to say anything, have him reject me and then lose him as a friend-coworker. He never talks about other woman and he says he's single, never wants to get married and hates relationships. I'll be leaving the company within the next year but do I just try and detach myself now because nothing is ever going to happen? I'm not saying I'm looking to be in a relationship but I think we would have a really fun time together, not being together
If I were you, I would be bold and ask him if he wants to hang out. You have nothing to lose except feeling disappointed if he declines your request, but you would get over it. It is better to know than not to know at all. As he may be interested but does not feel confident enough to ask or maybe shy. So don't let this opportunity pass you by, be brave, strong and go after what you desire regardless of the outcome. Best of luck!