Where do I stand?
i am 45, married and have 2 kids. i have fallen in love with a woman who is 33 and also has 2 kids. She prefers tall men of her age who have a deep voice. I am not any of these. There is a third person of her age who is tall and has a deep voice. He is also in love with her. He is also a guitarist and a good artist.
She says she has a soft corner for him and really likes him. On the other hand, she says that she finds my age to be a hindrance for her to be free with me. She says she has lot of respect for me!! We meet like once in a fortnight and go for a drive, whereas she meets him everyday. She says that she doesn't meet him like she meets me. She says that she doesnt love me but says she doesn't love him also. on my insistence she agreed to a 'Maybe'
Where do I stand in this relation? Is it really as bad as it sounds for me? Or is there any twist anywhere? Where do i stand and What should i do?
I have to ask if you are in any way financially supporting her? Buying her things? Paying rent? Making payments?
The reason why I ask is that she is giving the relationship Just enough so that you hang on to hope. And she teases you just enough to keep you interested.
Why do you put energy into this relationship?
I'm sorry this may be harsh sounding...You often hear in my neck of the words "player" an it usually pertains to a man.
But it sounds like this girl is a "player" to me....They jump around to different people to feed whatever needs they have going on.
So you are providing her with something she likes and she genuinely "likes" you but is also getting something she wants.
And this other guy also she is getting something from him...and who knows if you are the only TWO....and if you stop seeing her...she will move on to the next person who can provide her with what she needs.
you can't pressure anyone into love...if she loved you...you would know it...
In my opinion you should not let her play with your "feelings" anymore, because it doesn't sound like your relationship is based on mutual feelings. AND YOU DESERVE someone that is with you and only you and is developing feelings and having good times with ONLY YOU..
What should you do? Tell her that you need to stop seeing her for a while so you can focus on looking for a longer term relationship with someone who wants to be "serious" with you.