So many problems in my relationship
IAM_ME - Sep 30 2020 at 19:34
When our relationship is good... Well it's just that, good.
There are so many issues that I've got to a point where I'm not even sure it's worth it anymore.
Don't get me wrong I haven't made it easy myself.
It's so dysfunctional and unhealthy partly because of me, that I feel like I may as well just end it.
But then there's another part of me that is fighting to hold in a power through all the hard stuff.
Should it really be this hard though?
1.we don't have great communication but it is slowly getting better.
2.our sex life isn't what I'd like it to be but again has improved.
3. We have very different views on a lot of things food being one. He can't cook and is a fairly picky eater so I struggle to find something both of us will eat... Or I get tired of cooking separate meals all the time. He doesn't eat veg and doesn't offer his son veg either, which is a big no no for me. (the picky eating I could manage and get used to over time of he helped cook)
4. He doesn't invite me to his house. We actually broke up over this. Yes we got back together (why bother right?)
4a. I've had to ask him to help with standard daily 'chores' when he's at mine. (yeah he does it now, well sort of half does it)
5. We don't have fun together anymore, go out on dates etc...
Our relationship has become one big ball of stress (with me being agitated all the time or picking at him and then eventually getting so depressed about it I don't even want to see him/talk to him) and we're both about done with it.
I need some perspective as my minds all over the place. Do I give up now? Or do we have one long chat and try for the last time?
I feel like if we tweaked our relationship it would be so much better. At the same time I'm not sure of we're just past that point
Relationships are never easy but it helps if you guys share values and goals and have the willingness to make it work together. If you don't, then you need to look at what attracts you to your guy and how much you are prepared to put into your relationship until such a time you realize that your guy isn't contributing like you are. If he doesn't meet your expectations of a partner, then you will struggle to be happy and you can't change him because if you choose to be with him, then have to accept him as he is, warts and all.
If the fun's gone out of your relationship, then you either, as you post, have a serious conversation or you walk away. You're either in love with this guy and need to be with him, or you're not and if you're not, then you know what to do.