Need help to get my life back together
So where to begin really?
•I’m 29 years old
•I’m from a wealthy and respected family
•My family is stable – no real problems
•I have no friends – lost many friends due to my high alcohol consumption
•I never had a loving relationships – Dated only 2 girls in high school and that’s it.
•Lost my virginity with a prostitute
•I have been masturbating a lot everyday for 15 years
•I consume a lot of alcohol alone
•When drunk I do stupid things - Like having sex with prostitutes – 15 prostitutes now
•Professionally I have a good stable job
•I interact with colleagues – small talks only. We do not meet outside work
•I’ve been trying to stop masturbating and alcohol to improve my life but I cannot resist the urge
I feel so alone. I want some caring friends. I want to get a girlfriend. I really don’t know what to do. Please can someone advise me? Thank you.
I know this..because I have had this problem...many problems in life.
When you stop drinking alcohol...Life just gets better.
I quit for 8 years....life got better.
I drank again...Life gets worse.
Sounds simple..its not simple.....but its true.
I think that you are a loving heart cased in by negative energy and growth in the gardens of your mind.
You entitled your letter “Need help getting my LIFE back together”. Our individual LIFE FORCE is defined by our experiences that create tunnels to flow through generating power for us to live on.
You have taught your life force ‘what life is’ with certain activities. Your thoughts, and actions have carved out paths that you now realize are not supporting your peace and freedom.
Our experiences and choices take over our lives, we were designed this way so that the things that we do become easier to us. So, what are we training ourselves to do?
It’s easy to imagine a maze with paths open to certain rooms and other paths closed. Its time to redesign your maze.
Look at yourself as a science project, detach your emotions and ego so you can see truth that you can work with. What have you trained yourself to do? What kind of thoughts do you have? When gathering these answers don’t feel bad about yourself, feel good that you are looking at it and doing something about it. You have to see it so that you can recognize those thoughts in your mind that lead you wrong and STOP, allowing you to reroute them to better choices. You want to say to yourself ‘That ISN’T me, that is ENERGY that has a hold on me.’ Freeing you, giving you back control so that you can FEEL GOOD.
Another reason not to feel bad about to past allowing you to build your life over is….
The world is full of positive and negative energy, negative energy is feeding your urges to make bad choices. Also, you might have been fed negative energy intentionally or unintentionally, the world is full of jealous and hateful people.
To be ‘damned’ is to not be able to believe in yourself, or be ALIVE in yourself but instead interrupted by external energy, blocked from your true nature.
Next time you get an urge to do something that you know is wrong remind yourself of these sciences and make the conscious choice to do something else that gives you life and grow new patterns and tunnels for yourself to live with.
You are still connected to your senses enough to know that you need help and that is why I am taking the time to share my thoughts with you. People that have lost consciousness and care are termed ‘zombies’ and there is a large population of them in the world, its why there are so many films about them.
When I hear that someone is an alcoholic is immediately think that this person LOVES LIFE! They have just forgotten all of the ways that life can flow through them and have taken the quick fix easy route so that they can feel how they once felt. There were things in your life that made you feel wonderful, healthy, positive, good things…. What were they? Can you do them again or find other things in this playground of a planet to love?
“I feel so alone. I want some caring friends. I want to get a girlfriend. I really don’t know what to do.” -- You want to feel GOOD (about yourself and about life and that takes time, tie me, being tied to choices and experiences that feel good. … . The rest will follow.)
You know and believe that you can’t rely on your own mind… so build one on paper and follow it.
Start with pages with each of these titles and take your time to gather your answers. What other things do you want to define and be secure in? They should always be a work in progress. Eventually you will want to have a notebook that reflects what matters to you to help you redesign your mind. With review and building you will recreate the paths in your mind. You will change your life.
• I AM..
• LIFE IS..
• LOVE IS…
• WHAT IS FUN?
• I NEED..
• WHAT IS FREEDOM?
• WHAT DO I BELIEVE IN?
• POSITIVE ENERGY
• NEGATIVE ENERGY
• STAR WARS
• BRUCE ALMIGHTY
• LORD OF THE RINGS
• MARK RUFFALO and his body of work
• WILL SMITH and his body of work
• ANNE HATHAWAY and her body of work
• ARIANA GRANDE (Sweetener)
• RECIPIES I WANT TO MASTER
There are all kinds of possibilities to define here, what inspires and matters to YOU? What do you stand for? What do you believe in (be alive in)? This is our gift in life, to choose our design. I bet you have a million wonderful pieces of puzzle in your mind that you just haven’t put together yet. To me, this is the ultimate FUN and thereby flow of life and power…. Gathering Truths.
Focus fights fear and fear is confusion which leads us to insecurity which leaves the door open for negative energy. We all have to collect our definitions so that we can believe in ourselves. That having been said it is important to recognize when what is living inside of us shouldn’t be, and who to open our minds to that will lift us. That usually doesn’t include the people around me but the people in stories. Surround yourself with art that supports your heart and dive into symbolism.
Get excited about this challenge and open your horizons to all of the different things there are to do in life, eventually you will find the things that give you that powerful energy and lift… without the fall after.
Define yourself and who you WANT to be … when you know who you are and you are doing the things that you truly enjoy doing you will attract people that want to exchange that same energy with you. But if you stay broken you will have the zombie like quality of draining people of their energy.
We are all powerhouses of positive and negative energy at different times in our lives. Burning SAGE and using SEA SALT WATER BOWLS (look them up online) are two ways that help cleanse negative energy away from our bodies and our environments. They are very important.
I believe that LIFE IS THE DISCOVERY OF TRUTH AND THE PURSUIT OF FREEDOM
It is my hopes that you will find that truths in this letter that will help you forgive yourself. I hope that you enjoy a relationship with TRUTH and beauty that is all around us in nature, music, film,… life. I hope that you find a sense of purpose believing in yourself and that your contribution of positive energy is desperately needed in the world.
PS: The show FRIENDS is the worlds best friend creatively presenting truths that support our freedom
Hi. I am genuinely sorry that you are going through this. You aren't alone - we all suffer from some addiction that impacts our lives in different ways. One person may not be an alcoholic but may have a shopping problem, etc. I only tell you this to make you know that you aren't alone. You aren't the only one that has problems.
I am not going to hide my suggestion or speak double talk to you. I think your answer is God. The reason I say this is that the Bible teaches us that we are all sinners. Every one of us. What does that mean in our life? That everyone has problems and issues. Everyone does things they are ashamed to have done. But God provides an answer in his Son, Jesus Christ. How? He died for our sins meaning he made us clean (as white as snow, the Bible says). If you accept that and have faith in that, you will see your life change.
I am sorry if this offended you or you feel like I am on my religious soapbox but I have seen miraculous recoveries in alcoholics and drug addicted people due to turning to the Lord. I would like to see the same thing for you. The answer truly is there if you just look for it.
We all get caught up in different realities that don’t let us see with perspective. Good realities and bad realities.
Today, I have stomach ache, head ache, heart ache, knee ache and I am longing for the days that I was healthy and able to do all kinds of wonderful and fun things. There are going to be days ahead of all of us that are filled with pain as we age. When I am sick like today I am reminded of this and it makes me want to take more control over my life so that I can make the most of my experiences when I can.
Days like today remind me of how important it is to build both my physical health and my mental peace so that when I do have to suffer… its lessened by my mind that has been built towards freedom and not full of the daily gook that can snowball and become my life.
I think the best way to change our lives is to start with our environment.
Donate as much of your things that you can to charity, throw as much as you can away.
If you can move apartments or houses, if not... COMPLETELY CHANGE YOUR SPACE so that it feels FRESH CLEAN and brand new.
Old patterns and old energy have to go.
Think of your life as a blank canvas and rebuild. HAVE FUN WITH IT! ENJOY YOURSELF. DREAM OF ALL OF THE POSSIBILITIES THERE ARE IN LIFE
TO DO (one experience at a time)
You sound depressed. Alcohol and sex with unknown women are a temporary fix, but then come back to feed your self-shame. Hence the vicious cycle.
Are you willing to find a counselor to help you out with your alcohol addiction? And get help to stop drinking (through AA?)
You sound like you are tired of your life. That's a good motivator. Good luck.