Having second thoughts about first home with partner
We’ve been together 5 years and life is very easy together. Sometimes it feels too plain if that makes sense. He would do almost anything for me and I fully trust him.
Sometimes I just wish he made me laugh and shared stories with me and then I feel guilty cause he is so nice/ I’ve always wanted someone loyal. Laughing is such an important part to me and it’s so easy to make me laugh but he doesn’t even try which I find so weird for a guy. Most guys I know are always trying to make people laugh!
The closer it gets to buying a house together the more I feel nervous that I’m making the wrong decision and will live in a house that lacks the fun I’ve always imagined. Possibly even feel stuck in a mediocre life.
My auntie has said to me no man has it all, life isn’t like the movies and you never truly know someone until you live with them. A friend has said I’m “settling”. I personally feel bipolar about it all.
It sounds like he has a lot of good qualities but just doesn’t have the personality that you need to have in your life.
Don’t feel bad about having to let this very nice fella go, he will find another person who does appreciate his quiet or withdrawn temperament. The last thing that you want is to be bored in a relationship or to feel pity- love for someone.
Well, my input on this is talk to him about it. Maybe find things you both can do together that have to do silly and funny things with each other. Like a funny comedy movie or what not. I think I just would express that he is a great guy but just want to have that spark of fun. It has to be both of you and not just one person doing all the 'spark". It is not easy and I would be a little nervous too moving in with me in an apartment as well.
I hope this helps you!
“Life is easy”, that is wonderful because that means that you can pursue anything that you want to. You are bored and that is in part because our brains are more powerful than ever.
You haven’t found the things that give you life to fill your life up with.
Everyone is different with different hobbies, interests, challenges, dreams, …. You have to define what yours are. When you do, you will open up to a whole new exciting world of puzzles that will satisfy you.
Make a list of all of the different things that people do and when one seems interesting try it. Some things you will want to pursue further while other things you wont find you have the knack for. It is important to remember that talent takes time to build.
I love and hate math, I am challenged by it but it is so satisfying when I get the right answer. There is a lot of frustration and a lot of joy, but it isn’t something I want to make a talent.
I love words, I am challenged by them and satisfied when I write a poem. There used to be frustration when I noticed that I thought I was saying one thing but later realized my words were saying something else, but I love it, I am compelled to write, and I do… and now after years I have talent.
One talent achieved holds the foundation for us to acquire other talents. We just have to try and believe in ourselves.
Life is what we make it.
Once your life is full.... you will realize what a wonderful support your husband is in just being a simple good man.