Scared beyond belief
I have recently reconnected with an old schoolfriend via social media after a long period of time, which although is great, it has stirred up some very old emotions.
At school I suppose I was 'in love ' with her but never had the courage to do anything about it. It probably sounds ridiculous but after 30+ years, all of the feelings and emotions have returned.
I am currently in a relationship, but have been unhappy for quite a while, which probably sounds like a cliche but is the absolute truth.
At this moment in time I am absolutely terrified.
My advice is to forget about her. If you can't control your emotions and you are willing to let it sabotage your current relationship, then you need to walk away.
If only it were that simple.
It really is. Let me share a little wisdom that I was taught during my upbringing.
"The only thing you can control is yourself."
There isn't any excuse for what you choose to do. Your actions are your own. Either you choose to act with integrity, or you don't. The choice, action, and consequences are solely your responsibility.
Do what you want, but own your actions.
What are you terrified of? You really need to identify that.
Is it because you are thinking of leaving a relationship that you’re not satisfied with to something that you don’t know is even real? ( the unknown?)
If you weren’t happy then just running into this old friend wouldn’t bring up so many feelings ( as teenager they as they are, please remember that!)
Time to look at your current relationship and make some hard decisions. If it requires you to stand on your own for a while then be ready to face that.
Only after that is done should you turn around and look at all the potential Opportunities out there for a quality love life.
I think it's just brought home how unhappy I am with my current situation. I know I need some time on my own, I think that's the thing I'm scared of.