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Just a joke??

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I need an honest opinion from the outside. So my husband is a funny guy. Very quick witted. That's one of the things I love about him. But, sometimes he makes jokes that seem to be at my expense. Then when I tell him he hurt my feelings, he says he would never purposely hurt my feelings and is just trying to be funny. Tell me what you think...so we are on the phone with his brother to wish him Happy Thanksgiving. We are explaining to his brother that we are making homemade moonshine and limoncello for Christmas gifts tomorrow. So we're talking about that and his brother is telling us good luck in making the limoncello, and my husband says, "Well when I've made limoncello in the past I've been surrounded by beautiful naked women peeling the lemons, but this year I just have (my name). So we'll see if it comes out as good." I half heartily chuckle as obviously the "surrounded by beautiful naked women" was a joke). But then his brother kind of chuckled and then said, "Aww, I'm sure it will be just as good." So, I'm feeling like his brother thought it wasn't that funny of a joke and was kinda mean or unnecessary. Which makes me think that I'm validated in my hurt feelings. My husband makes little jokes like this often, and in front of others. He swears he's just trying to be funny. I tried to explain why it wasn't funny and it's like he's putting me down, and he just says, "Why would I want to put you down?" Then he says he's just not gonna say anything anymore. As if I'm overreacting. I really want to know if others would take this the same way, and if so, why would he do this?

Just a joke??

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You're not overreacting at all. The "joke" about the limoncello was at your expense. You told him you don't like him including you in his "jokes" (which are really veiled put-downs)- so he has an obligation to stop making "jokes" like that. He's not as funny as he thinks he is when he cracks those so-called "jokes" knowing that they make you feel bad. What it is is disrespectful, and he's not only hurting you, but he is also making himself look like a fool.

Just a joke??

NOTAJUDGE profile image
Yea, he can find a million things to joke about, he can clearly avoid making you the butt of a joke. Usually people will pick on those they feel are easy targets. Shut it down, wives are supposed to be treated with the upmost respect period. You are not sensitive for bringing it up nor are you wrong for pointing it out.

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