Ex from a month is messing with my head
So my now ex girlfriend split up with me over a month ago, now I don’t know if this is because my previous relationships have been pushed and I’ve ended up disliking my other exes before her but I’m really confused as to how I’m feeling on it all.
Basically the reasons she gave to me where our arguments that got quite bad over the last month or so- but I had believed it was just a phase, said that to her at the time & she had said little/nothing about the possibility of her splitting us up (she had the intention of still remaining friendly with each other as we have a few mutual friends) So it was all very very sudden when it did happen.
She went through the process of clearing all of my stuff out of her house very quickly & has now taken to posting a lot more regularly on her social media pages than she did when we were together. I had texted her a few weeks ago telling her my feelings wouldn’t change that I still want her etc. Her response was similar to what she said when she originally broke up but she left the door ajar with some things she said ‘You’ll get what you want, it might not be from me, but you will’ being one of them. She then proceeded to text me on Christmas Day then mute my texts not long after (no further conversation has been had).
My plan was to always give it a little bit of time as I believe she’ll see things my way soon ish, but how long can I leave it? I’ve basically not accepted it yet Cos I know it will hurt me, but am I doing more damage to myself in the long term? I know the process of getting closure will need me to speak to her face to face, but I don’t know how acceptable that will be to her? Any advice on how I go about the next few weeks of my life would be appreciated
Kinda looks like she's leading you on. I would just give up. It's not worth it. Definitely avoid rebounds and give yourself some time. But don't try to get answers from her anymore.
No, closure doesn't depend on speaking to her face to face. You've been there and done that. You're looking for an excuse to see her again and plead your case for a continued romance. It's over. It isn't acceptable to ask that of her. She's broken it off, returned your things. The ONLY answer that YOU"LL accept is for her to come back to you. She's not obligated to do that.
Closure is YOU recognizing she's moved on, and you should too. I can't think of anything ANYBODY can say that truly provide 'closure' to someone else. The person who is being left behind may say he/she is willing to do anything, change anything - but that's not realistic OR healthy. You're doing what many people do after a breakup- looking at every interaction as a sign she's willing to come back. It doesn't sound like she is. It sounds like she's trying to spare your feelings and give you encouragement to move on.