My boyfriend won’t introduce me to friends or family
I’ve been with my boyfriend for over a year, and I still haven’t met his friends or family (other than his flatmate). He’s met both mine and it makes me feel sad and excluded from a large part of his life. I told him a few months ago how it makes me feel and he promised I’d meet them soon, but so far nothing. His parents and the mother of his child don’t even know I exist. I appreciate he wants to protect his daughter which is why I’ve been patient, but it’s been so long I just don’t see it happening.
And if it does, it’s embarrassing. His family are going to wonder why he didn’t mention me for so long. If I was them I wouldn’t consider me a serious candidate. He’s just gone on a weekend away with his siblings, their partners and their kids and I feel so low and left out.
Am I being stupid?
You're not being stupid. It's possible you're being led on.
A year? Yeah, at that point it's reasonable to expect to be introduced to friends and family. I suspect he doesn't consider you a serious candidate. That doesn't mean there's something wrong with you, just that maybe he senses that the two of you have differences that won't be resolved to form a long term relationship. Is there pressure from his family to marry within a certain ethnic or religious group? Have you been physically intimate? That you haven't even met his friends is just odd. I suspect he maybe is seeing someone else. I wouldn't confront him, because if he hasn't been honest up to this point, he won't be when you bring it up. I wouldn't issue an ultimatum, either. Then you've got to follow through, and if you don't, he knows your threats are meaningless.
I wouldn't confront, argue, debate a guy about something like this. I'd invite him over to your place and meet him at the door with whatever things he may have left at your flat. Then I'd say, "I don't see our relationship progressing. Here are your things. Good bye and good luck," hand him his stuff and close the door. Thank goodness you're not living together.
Yeah, it's pretty odd that he hasn't introduced you to his family after 12 months. He could have a very good reason or not, but he's being disrespectful to you either way. You either get in his face or you walk away with your head up.
Ask yourself why you would bother being with someone who treats you like a doormat and ask yourself if he shares your values?? because if he doesn't, then you need to be kind to yourself and get out of there full stop.
Throw rocks at him if you must, but just get him out of your life because his actions, and never mind his words, are telling you that you're not one of his main priorities.