How do I tell my parents?
ERYENGESH - Feb 22 2023 at 08:52
I'm a 24 year old dude. I'm in huge trouble related to my career as well as health. I made extremely foolish decision.
I am having mucormycosis like symptoms since late April 2021 (caught due to covid-19). When I heard about this disease for the 1st time, it was already very progressed as it reached my eyes by that time. Two months later, it had reached my brain (around July 2021). I feel uneasiness due to this disease. I neither got treated nor did I diagnosed it. I haven't told my parents yet because it is too traumatising to tell. I know I have to get my eyes removed if I receive treatment.
Due to uneasiness, I gave my 3rd semester MA exam very horribly. Due to fear of getting failed, I was afraid of checking my result. I somehow tried to check my result just few days before my 4th semester exam and saw that I got luckily passed. When I tried to give my 4th semester exam, I felt so uneasy due to horrible symptoms that I managed to give only one paper. Therefore, I failed in 4th semester. I did not even tell my parents about 4th semester exams because I thought they will be upset if I tell them about my result just few days before my exam.
I am yet to inform my parents about my illness and failure in exams. If I tell them, they may get heart attack or extreme anger. I just acted on my uneasiness.
Oh my God, ERYENGESH, I am so, so sorry for you, that is just horrible and terrible...and too many other adjectives.
But what do you mean your parents could get angry? Upset, probably, and determined to step in to take control of the situation for you but - angry? Angry at what? This is a full-adult sized event, knowing-how-to-handle-it-wise. Sweetheart, you're only 24, not 44!
...or is an angry reaction just your fear?
I'm guessing you're an only child?
I'm a parent and - me, I am just ASTOUNDED AND DEAD IMPRESSED that you still managed to pass your 3rd semester exam! That itself is incredible achievement enough under such traumatic circumstances!
Do you have a friend or relative who could be with you when you sit your parents down to tell them, does the thought of that make it seem less daunting?
PS: Alternatively (or additionally), what you CAN do (which, I believe is what most people do) is speak to your GP or hospital specialist and ask for an appointment in his/her office so that he/she can tell your parents. This would not only inhibit any untoward reactions, but it would also provide a greater sense of safety and security for your parents, especially as your specialist can field/address their, doubtless, barrage of ensuing questions and fears.
I'd have thought that were the easiest option? What do you think?
You haven't been diagnosed yet, is that what I understand?
What if it's not what you think?
You should see a doctor, yesterday. Having you die would be far harder on your parents than anything you've mentioned in your post.
My symptoms are very similar to Mucormycosis. The chronology of my symptoms is exactly like Mucormycosis.
Treatment of Mucormycosis is really expensive which I cannot afford. In this disease, eyes and jaws are removed to remove the fungus and brain surgery is also needed sometimes. Treatment is both unaffordable and painful.
I cannot live without eyes. I know doctors will say that I need to get my eyes removed to get cured. Since I have destroyed my master's degree, I am very worried about my career. I fear I may remain jobless.
I made a very big mistake by telling lies to my parents. They will be really upset if they knew I was fooling them for a long time.
Will I get a job? I have already ruined my career with my stupid decision. I should have given my exam but I listened to my impulse. I still have a BA degree.
I don't know if I am able to do anything with this level of discomfort.