Having a bf with children
I have been with my bf for almost two years. We have the usual arguments that are to expect from a relationship but He is kind and loving and overall I am very happy with him. My problem is his prior life. He has been married and has three children and on top of that has three other kids (twins from one woman and one child from another). He swears he wishes he never had those kids (the three outside the marriage) but it wasn't his decision and he cant change it. He loves his children dearly and takes very good care of them. I just feel insecure about what other people are going to think when i tell them about my bf having so many kids. I am single young woman with no children that has never been married. I like being around his kids and they like me but sometimes I feel overwhelmed specially thinking about telling my family about this. Any suggestions or thoughts?
You've been dating for two years and your family doesn't know this yet? It's just a bit odd to me, but of course I don't know the entire situation. I'd be careful. Any parent who regrets any one of his children isn't the type of guy I'd like to be with. He should embrace all of them, even if they were all little surprises. It was his decision if he didn't wear protection. Also, you are a young woman with no children and never been married, so you should not feel obligated to these kids, even if you like them. You are not their mother and should not have to feel responsible for raising or supporting any of them. But since you are dating their dad, you should most assuredly be kind when they are around (I'm sure you are though!). If it is overwhelming and interfering with you personally, don't take it on. None if these children were your choice and are not yours. There is no reason for you to have to suffer mentally/physically/emotionally from exhaustion! My guess is people may feel he is irresponsible, seeing as he has so many kids in and out of marriage and yet he feels it was not his choice. There is nothing you can do to change it. You can only change yourself. So if you think it's worth it, stick with him and be ready for criticism, but don't feel obligated
One. It wasn't his decision where to put his (you know what) and he can't change (that he didn't use a condom) it? Please. You are wise enough to keep this boyfriend from your family. You should be wiser and keep him from you. I really hope you are using protection so you don't end up with another child he wished he never had. You would think that after the first mistake, he would be grown enough to prevent it from happening again with different woman. We love who we love, but look at all the whole story and figure out if you want this to be part of your story. It's not about having a boyfriend with children and he's a great and responsible and hands on father. He has 6 kids and 3 are mistakes. Clearly this guy does not have good grown up judgement.