Boyfriend's differing opinions
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 years now. In the beginning of our relationship, we were very young. We were still in high school. At that time he introduced me to marijuana, which I liked very much. He and I smoked it quite a bit but we always had great times together. My opinion of cannabis is that it is okay to be used once in a while. As long as you are not dependent on it, I do not see the harm. We had a period where we did harder drugs along with alcohol heavily. During this time there was no use of marijuana. We were around friends who did not smoke and abandoned the ones that we used to hang out with. We quit that lifestyle but now that life is stable again I want to smoke again. Maybe once or twice a month? I am in college and have two jobs. When I used to smoke I maintained a high average in school and still do. I have been experiencing joint and foot pain lately and my doctor is referring me to a Rheumatologist. It will take months to get in. I have read about the anti-inflammatory properties in marijuana. I want to try to see if it will help with my pain. My boyfriend is opposed to me smoking. It makes him anxious. He does still drink. I just wish he would let me smoke occasionally by myself. I would love if he would do it with me, like old times. But he won't. I know many people who smoke that you wouldn't expect, they are very smart and successful people. I am an adult now and after seeing the damaging effects of other drugs, including alcohol, cannabis seems incredibly tame. What should I do? How do I approach my boyfriend about this? He shuts me down when I mention it. I love him but I do not see the harm in it. Thank you for any replies.
You say that your bf: "shuts you down" when you raise this issue, and that sounds as if he's treating you as less than an equal and adult partner.
If he doesn't want you to smoke, then I think he has every right to put his point of view, and I think you should consider his views on this, but the bottom line is that you are an adult and so should make your own decision on this.
If he is not willing to respect your right to make your own decision on this, I suggest you think long and hard about where this relationship is going.