My boyfriend cannot acknowledge his mistakes mentally
I love my boyfriend to death and always will. We have been together for 6 months and we have so much fun and enjoy life together, but there is one recurring problem that he cant solve and that is him being able to admit to his problems when confronted instead of changing the subject or blaming me for his fault. i tell him over and over again and we talk and talk. for example: we go shopping at a store and he goes looking at stuff and might ask me how this looks and i say great. (which i forgot to mention he likes to rush in stores and i like to take my time and this always upsets him and makes me feel like im a bad guy when im not. am i?) I will usaully pick up items at that same time and show him and he either has already walks away or has tuned me out until i actually get upset and confront him and then he changes the subject and is like "hey i like this," and im like,"i was asking you a question why cant you answer," and he cannot for the life of him ever answer a honest question. this mental problem of his is really srewing with our relationship and making me feel like the suspect all the time and im not that, and he cant ever realize, own up too, or say i will try and figure out why i do this even if he cant understand (i think it is mental because he crys like a kid and then changes the subject really fast) not once have i gotten a sincere apology when he is definitely in the wrong and i cant go on living like this isnt a problem i tell him and he automatically say were breaking up? and im like no but its need fixed. i say "are you willing to get help or counseling" and then we are back to square one. it is so frustrationg? i need help please i try my hardest to give him everything but this problem is killing me and if this is a mental condition for him what do i do? pleaseee help?
If you have tried to talk to him many times and he can't seem to tell the truth, you give him an ultimatum- either you deal with this or we're threw!! You have to understand that if you feel that the best that you can do is him, then this will become difficult. He will know if you're serious or not, so you have to work yourself up to the point where, you may let him go. Why? because if you get to that point, then you WILL be serious when you say "either you deal with this lying or we're threw!!"
Run. Run like the wind. My father was exactly this way when my mom and he started dating. My mom thought it was weird and quirky and wondered if she was just doing things to upset him but didn't think too much of it. His problems eventually became so bad that as a family we were walking on eggshells trying not to upset him and it was like we were held hostage by his issues. My mom and he are still together, but miserable. She often says that she wished she had noticed these red flags earlier on. What you are describing is exactly what she said he would do. It may very well be a mental problem, but years down the line when you start a family and realize that this behavior harms your children and you, you'll look up ways to get him medical care or try to set up an intervention but ultimately it won't matter because he'll genuinely believe that YOU are the problem and you are the crazy one and you can't force someone to get help when they don't think they need it.
I know you'll probably read this and think, "okay, that was just her weird little family story but that's not going to happen to me," but please just think about it.
It's a lot easier to get out now at 6 months than it is when you've invested a few years into a relationship.