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Confused and pregnant

Posted by
on Feb 5 2013 at 23:18
Member since: 06 February 2013
Relationship advice forum category advice forum category :cry: I'm so devastated I just don't know what to do. Let me begin by saying I'm 19 and 5 months pregnant. My ex boyfriend abandoned me when I was 12 weeks. We were together for 8 months. Everything was great until I told him I was pregnant. He started to become distant which lead to him to stop coming around. I didn't hear from him until last month when he called and told me he didn't want to be with me :?. That led into an argument and I hung up the phone. Soon after I found out that my second ultrasound was coming up, me thinking he would want to be involved I called him and told him the information. To my surprise he just said "I don't understand why you are telling me this." "I don't want to be with you." That made me so angry. He doesn't want to be apart of my baby girl life because he doesn't want to be with me. It's not like I'm calling him to get back with him, that's definitely is not the case. I just want him to be there for my precious angel. I'm lost I really don't know what to do...please help!
Reply from
on Feb 6 2013 at 00:08
Member since: 10 August 2012
Gender: Female
ThaTs terrible to hear that your ex is such a low person not wanting to be involved with your baby, but by the sounds of it I think you and your baby girl might be better off without him as the father, I can't see him being a very good father and besides there are many single mums out there who raise amazing kids without a father (personal experience) also you don't need to be alone in this I'm sure you'd have the support of friends and family and who knows you might meet a man who will be a real father to your little one, someone who will love and respect both of you. Also I suggest you don't voluntarily tell your ex anything about your progress with your baby, if he wants to know he should come to you, it's your baby and you should do what's best for her, he dosnt need to be in her life. As long as he has a strong loving mum you both will be fine.
Reply from
on Feb 12 2013 at 04:02
Member since: 11 February 2013
I totally understand where your coming from. And as much as it will hurt to do, let him go. Worrying about him and his issues, or whether or not he wants to be apart of your baby's life shouldn't be your main concern. Your concern is your baby and you and your well-being. That was a cowardly act on his part to leave you while you are pregnant. But you can do this on your own with good support from whoever is near to you. Don't give up because when you come out on the other side, and know that you done it all on your own that will be the best reward to yourself and your precious one. I wish the very best on your journey :)
Reply from
on Feb 13 2013 at 00:59
Member since: 13 February 2013
That's really terrible :( All i can do is encourage you and tell you i went through almost the exact same thing. I was with my ex for 4 years before getting pregnant, and when he found out he started to cheat on me, and beat me. Finally i left and still tried to keep him in my daughters life, up untill this last summer on her 2nd birthday. He gave her second degree burns on her wrist trying to turn me into children services to get full custody. Anyway, my point is... no matter how much your child will eventually miss them and no matter how much you want to see him involved or need his help, if he doesnt want to be there for you or your child it will just hurt you both far more in the longterm. Its been a hard time for me dealing with the fact that she may miss him but i feel better knowing that she will never have to think about him and ask why he doesnt care. Keep your chin up... you will feel better soon, just keep you and the baby happy and healthy. :)
Reply from
on Feb 14 2013 at 22:14
Member since: 02 January 2013
If you really dont want to get back with him then you should tell him that you you dont want to be with

him but that you just want him to be there for your daughter and if he doesn't step up then screw him.

Because if he's not showing any interest then your daughter is better of without him and although it might seem hard right now get the support of your friends and faimly and your do fine.

Hope this helps.

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