Moved with fiance in new city living with two of his friends is putting stress on relationship
Ok so my fiance needed to move to another city for a job and I came with him but I left my family and friends in a city a few hours away by flight. Im in my early twenties and I am finding it tough here because I dont know anyone and my fiance is always working from morning til 6 and he has to work on weekends sometimes.
The hardest part for me is adjusting to living with two of his friends that are very messy and told me that they don't know if they can keep the place clean because that's how they are used to living. I told my fiance its hard for me to adjust but he said he can't change his friends. Also his friends invite ppl i dont even know here sometimes and the first week i moved in i had plans with my fiance to have a dinner with him at home and he comes home saying okay three guys are coming here so they can drive me to go pick up something at the post office that was mailed to us so he was gone for two hours and they all show up and started drinking in the apartment while he left me in the room while he started cooking dinner for the guys.
I don't know maybe its just because I feel already awkward living with two of his friends and he brings in more guys on a moments notice to have drinks with because they did him a favour driving him somewhere. I just feel left out alot and in the past i didn't mind when he had friends there it's just we went from living just the two of us to this. I told him im trying to adjust as much as I can but the three of them are more fluent in another language then english so they always speak another language infront of me. My fiance used to be the sweetest most caring person and put me first but now that he works all day with one of the other guy roomates and sometimes works extra hours with him i feel kinda left out. I applied for jobs here but i find it lonely being here all day alone.
We have been bickering lately because he doesn't understand that its hard for me here. Do i have a right to find it hard to adjust? He's making me feel guilty for being homesick and for cleaning up after the guys because I can't live like a slob he told me to just let the guys be messy because we can't change them. What should I do? hes not as communicable as he used to be because i feel hes getting used to living with guys and not understand a women's point of view... Any advice on how to fix this situation would be great... how would you feel in this situation and what would you do? sorry its a long question thank you so much!
Maybe you should join something like yoga and make friends in the area around you, to get to know some people. But when you followed him, you should have known you had to adjust.
And maybe you could talk to your fiancé about getting an apartment to yourselves so it will feel more like it did before.