Older man treats me like dirt
on Oct 14 2007 at 13:17
I am 20 and my boyfriend is 47. i have been with him 2 and a half years. He has cheated on me a number of times and i have found used condoms in his bedroom he just denies it and turns it to me. He has been violent in the past. He never spends any time with me and we have sex about once every three weeks. I have tried ending it but i always give in and go back to him. I love him but its not what i want. i cant cope with it anymore its cracking me up. I feel worthless. What should i do.
on Oct 14 2007 at 20:24
Dont let him treat you like this, if you have found out that he has cheated on you then there is no way that I would put up with it. It sounds like you need to follow a different path in life. What is it that makes you feel as though you love him? Is it the sex and nothing else?
Find yourself a new man, someone who wants to spend time with you and have fun doing what 20 year olds do. The one you've been seeing sounds like he is just in it for the sex, and he is playing on your weakness in the fact that you have feelings for him.
on Oct 15 2007 at 17:09
We hardly ever have sex tho, i moan at him about it and he doesnt even make a murmur, he ignores me. Its not the sex why i stop with him, I dont know what it is. I love him but the only time he shows any interest in me is when we split up and i meet some1 else then hes constantly textin and phoning me and tells me he loves me, then i feel guilty and we get back together then everything goes back to normal. I feel worthless.
on Oct 17 2007 at 01:16
break the cycle darlin - once they cheat they always cheat again. He is using you for sex. If you don't want to give him up, ask him for money - at least as a prostitute you won't feel (financially) worthless - but If you think much more of yourself than that - and so you should -0h you have your whole life ahead of you - then get out of the relationship altogether. He is a middle aged man who is just using you. He should never hit you, and you should think a whole lot more of yourself than to let a bully like him hit you. You don't love him - you are too young to know what real love is. You are just in love with the idea of being in love with an older man. Get out. Go to college. Travel. Make a career for yourself whilst you are young enough to do so, and the right one will come along when you least expect it. If you were a mother, and your daughter came home and told you the same story, what advice would you give her? And if youtold your mother, she would probably give you the same advice. Parents and family can help you get over this man. Go talk to them and ask them to support you. They love you. They'll help. This dickhead is just out for what he can get. He will never be of any help to you. Especially when you are so emotionally fragile. Good luck.
on Oct 17 2007 at 13:56
i agree with sally, he is obviously just taking your kindness for a weakness. you seem like a very very cool, decent girl who has a lot to offer. just dont give it away to one who doesnt deserve it, i.e. your boyfriend. you're very young, my age in fact, there's lots of fun out there...go for it girl! im sure you'll be ok! gd luk with everything.