Is my husband going through a midlife crisis?
My husband and I have been married for 15 years, but now he wants to end things. We are both 51. He says he's tired of carrying the financial, emotional and chore load for our family (we have 3 kids) and instead of doing things for the family like he has been all these years, he wants to do something for himself. From what I've read, this is one of the classic symptoms of a midlife crisis. He says he's not happy with the way things are and he's given up. He claims he loves me but is not "in love" with me and that the flame has died out between us. He doesn't want to be tied down anymore. But here's the kicker: he's been messaging on Facebook with a woman he went to high school with who lives out in California. (We're in Florida.) They barely knew each other back then (30 years ago), but since reconnecting through Facebook, he has talked with her extensively about the problems in our marriage. He says he has fallen in love with her, and she with him. She is totally unlike me, as far as he's concerned. He says she's self-motivated, gets things done, and is a positive person. He says he won't have to carry the load with her in so many areas that he has had to with me. He felt like he was a grind and he says he doesn't think it will be a grind with her. He says she takes chances in life and isn't driven by her fears and insecurities. He made her out to be little miss perfect. I asked if there was anything that she does wrong, and he said she gets lost a lot when she's driving. Give me a break! So apparently now she's coming over here for a visit in September, he's going over there in March, and if all goes well she'll be moving here next fall. My question is how can he be truly in love with her if he's never even met her in person? They have only been chatting through Facebook and on the phone since July 2012. Chatting on the phone is one thing, but how can you he be so sure he's in love? I believe it's hard to tell if you're truly compatible with someone just by chatting with them. Is there any way I can save my marriage? Is this just a midlife crisis? Will he want to come back to me when he gets over it? Thanks in advance for any advice.
I don't know if id want someone back if they left me for an old flame after being married for 15yrs. Believe it or not I was in the same boat. My ex left me for an old flame after being married for 14yrs,and I took him back,because yes he came back,and I thought I still loved him. But really I was more hurt. My advice would be to you,is love yourself, your worth more than what you think, you should be strong when and if your husband wants you back you say noway,because this time you want to be happy and you deserve someone who even through hard times doesn't leave you,your not a doormat. So yeah,hope I helped you,dont take the scum back lol