This may be a long story so please bear with it, it starts with a woman i've known for quite a while (around 6+ years) she was my friends partner for those years and i met her though him, lets call her 'female friend', we got on together as much as my friend and hung out together sometimes, he was engaged to her for around a year before they had problems and eventually, split up.
I think she took the breakup pretty bad, i use to talk over the internet to her and she use to tell me things about what happend, she went abroad for around 4 months maybe to get over him, they lived in a house together along with 2 other of my/her friends. When she came back she seemed ok, but they were still on rocky grounds.
After a while things got better between them and one new year she had people over including me (often she would have new year partys) but her ex was not there since he was at another party, now she has always been the flirty type/open minded and we ended up kissing after a few drinks (often how it is) she is the best kisser i have ever kissed, it felt like i could kiss her forever!
As the night went on we would kiss whenever possible sneakly, we locked ourselfs in the toilet and passionatly kissed and fooled around with each other, i totally got lost in the moment and i have never had that before then! After that night we would see each other sometimes, it lasted for around 3 weeks before she kind of stopped bothering, i was dissapointed but i started seeing somebody soon after.
That relationship lasted around 10 month before we split, i was glad because we wasnt the same at all, not long after that happend i invited my female friend over because she needed to get out the house for a while, we ended up kissing again and it felt so good once again, she eventually left and yet again we would see each other after that, we went to my uncles place out of town for a night, this time round things was diferent, it was better! We would text each other all the time and see each other when we could! She would stay at mine some nights too and talk, we would talk about how things have turned out between us and that she thinks im great and the best kisser, she made me feel so good, and i loved doing things for her! i got a buzz, i layed candles round my living room and bought an expensive bottle of chanpagne one night, at christmas i got her a really nice present what she wanted (she obviously didnt tell me though), she was gobsmacked and quite shocked, her car broke down once and i drove miles just so she wouldnt be alone waiting for the pickup van, i was always willing to do anything for her, i had never felt this before.
We only ever had sex twice in the time we was going out but i wasnt that bothered about that, it was just so nice to be going out with her, she told me once in a text that she felt things for me but she was concerned about her ex because he was a close friend of mine, despite that they broke up a year and a half earlier, we had a talk and she suggested that we should see each other less, although that was the plan it didnt really change things, we kept seeing weach other about the same.
A few weeks later something changed and she wasnt texting as much, also she didnt come round as much, she always sent me a text saying 'i fell asleep' or 'she was planning to see her other friends' although it didnt concern me that much after a few weeks of less contact it started to then, but i was confused because when i did see her (once in 2 weeks at this point) it was still really nice, she would cuddle an kiss me the same but i kept thinking she was going off me or something.
Although i didnt see her she seemed to be asking me for lifts to places sometimes, like to clubs an things, and probably stupidly i did, she would kiss me so nice before she got out and i felt upset because she hadnt seen me in ages yet she would go out and then kiss me before she got out, it was like she was teasing me but i felt things for her and it made me feel angry.
After another period of not seeing her for a few weeks, i went out of town to some clubs with a few friends on a friday, after a few drinks she text me asking me for a lift to the garage cause she had been drinking and she couldnt drive, i felt so angry and i sent her a message kind of moaning about things, she was replying saying that i know how much she works and that she hasnt had any credit on her phone and that shes been busy but i knew it was all excuses and it made me so angry and upset, after that nothing was the same and i didnt hear anything from her in a while.
I didnt text her or anything because i thought she was mad at me, a little while longer and i caved and text her, we started a conversation up, she said she didnt think i was talking to her, she explained that she had been though some things since she thought i wasnt speaing to her but didnt tell me what and that she needed some time, we ended the conversation and i hadnt heard from her in weeks again.
I thought about her most of the time and one night she started chatting over the internet, she seemed sad. I told her i still missed her and she said she did too, she explained that she had strong feelings for me and could have loved me but she needed some space, after that she was on my mind again and has been ever since, she had such a big impact on me and i dont understand why i think about her so much, I have talked to her since then but she acts like nothing has ever happend, im so confused, i dont know whats gone on.
If i mention anything to do with missing her now she just sends a smiley face or just says thanks, its upsetting. What has happend, was i just wasting my time? Was i a rebound thing? She has seen other people before she started seeing me, including another friend of ours, although it didnt last that long and it wasnt as serious.
Thanks for reading.
To cut a long story short, she messed me about from start to finish, one minute she was all for us, even talked about eventually getting married, to suddenly wanting to break-up.
This can mess with your head if you let it, even though i know its hard at the time. But what you have to do and must do is look after your own interests. What i mean by that is, think you number 1 first. Do you really want to be spending more time with someone who doesnt really know what she wants?
You cant make someone form a committment towards you, and if you do then its only going to end in tears.
Time is a great healer, and in time you will find someone else who will care for you as much as you care for them. Im not going to say how long this will take, but it will happen.
I hope this has helped a little.
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