me: did u read my msg?
me: can u call me?
her: no, I'm the only wine awake
me: ok, well can you explain what you ment by the message you sent me yesterday
her: yeh, i just did
her: i feel like we are not so much on good sides now
her: and i don't want us to be forced living together
her: i feel this will only create troubles
her: and we have said in the past that it would have probably smarter to have our own spots just because we are so different
her: i feel really good now, l love my life and i am so balanced. i don't want this to be taken away. i turn off all the electronics by 10 and take a bath and sleep. i need this in order to stay balanced and i can't have that with you
me: okcan i say something now
me: please stop this now! i cant take this kinda pain over and over. first u are okay with me then u are mad then ur okay again then ur worried. i am a few days from comming home and now you are telling me when i get here that i dont have a welcome home after being away for 3 months so we can be together. everything i have done since i first got my ticket to Austria was for us to be together. and this was my hardest task in life yet. all i have wanted since iv been here was your support. i can understand if we are diffrent and you need this and i need that. i even understand if u want to be by your self
me: but i cant take anymore pain while im in serbia. i have no wall to lean apon
her: you said it yourself all the time.
her: we both know it
me: just wait
her: i need it clean, i need it quiet, i don't have that with you
me: please stop im not done
her: i am terrified of you coming back. i need my balanced relaxed place
me: STOP ! IM NOT DONE!
her: why would 2 people that kept arguing non stop for months live together? that is bs
me: i get you
me: just wait
me: we dont have to be a couple chiara but now that i have been here 3 months i need a place to live, idk if i can stay with friends. i just dont know
me: i wish you had told me this sooo much ealier
me: so i could just go home
me: the last few days u told me of finding this now place and im excited
me: now i know i dont have it
her: just ask friends. sasan has room mates, we don't know how much space they have and you always wanted to stay with michaels and told me you can go there anytime, now its problem?
me: you could at least let me come home for a while so i could feel normal then tell me but you make me go through hell then tell me
her: i need to be alone if we are trying to talk. i won't have enough space to breath with you. we will always argue and i can't take that
me: i cant believe ur telling me this
her: i need my space and you need yours.
her: we know that
me: ok but tell me when i get there so i can plan and rest from this hell
me: wtf is this?
me: this is crewelty
me: i have no garentied living
me: when i fought like hell to just live there in the first place
me: i fought like hell here in serbia alone while we argued here and didnt always even have ur support and at the verry end you throw me away like trash
me: ever have i thought you capable of this (NEVER)
me: ok i cant take any more
me: thanks for the chat but yet again im am led to another heart break
me: now my whole day has gone to shit and its only 8am.
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