I don't love my husband anymore
I feel horrible for saying it but I don't feel love toward him. We have been married now for almost 2 1/2 years and out daughter just turned 1. Through my whole pregnancy he had secret emails, and dating sites that he used to message with other women. He asks I hid girls number in his phone under work contacts( he is a us marine so his marines names) he would talk to these girls exchange pictures tell them he loved them that he was forced to marry me etc. he lied about where he was a few times and it has continued after the birth o our daughter. I mean countless pictures and girls. Every time he leaves for a mission he talks o them on secret apps. He even goes as far as to download texting apps while he is at work then deleted by the time he gets home. Most of these girls know he was married and didn't care. Well he has claimed he stopped. But I feel numb and dull to him. I don't want to spend time with him talk to him see him nothing. I'm sick of the lies and seeing so many other girls. It's like it's shredded my insides. Most of me wants to get a divorce and is disgusted in him. But what about our daughter...and as stupid as it sounds the only other reason is because I don't want him sleeping around with women. Not because I love him or because I value our marriage. Just jealously. Pathetic I know. What do I do?
You should definitely follow your heart. you have every reason not to be in love with him anymore after everything he's done and put you through. I understand a lot of people try to stay together in regards to their children but sometimes that makes things worse. your daughter is still going to have her dad. and as far as your reason for not wanting to divorce him.. you have to think, if he's done this much with the pictures and hiding messages what makes you think he hasn't been sleeping around as well? or that it wouldn't get to that. you have to think about your feelings first. he's already done so much to hurt you. would you rather him be sleeping around while you're still married or would you rather get away from all this pain and hurt and get out of this relationship so he cant hurt you anymore. you just have to follow your heart. I hope that you make the decision that's going to be best for you and your daughter. good luck!
I feel your pain same thing happen to me
we have a one year old also and I still love him!!!!!! I don't want anybody else its killing me inside im so unhappyi also caught him texting a friend of mine he made a pass at her and she reject him:... (
I am so sorry that you are experiencing this. Your husband isn't treating you with the respect that you deserve. It is completely understandable that you feel this way. Unfortunately many men who have these issues or behave this way never stop. It is difficult to think about, but ask yourself, can you live like this, married to him for the rest of your life?
I think you deserve better. It is complicated because of your daughter. Divorce is hard on children, but it also might have a negative impact on her if she grows up with a mom who is sad and always betrayed. She may see the relationship you have with your husband and become disillusioned with love or marriage, or she may begin to internalize the idea that men hurt women and treat them badly and they accept it. But if you and your husband separate, she might be spared from becoming cynical, she might just think that unfortunate as it is that marriage was just not right and didn't work out, but that it is possible to find love and happiness somewhere.
Regarding the jealousy, I think that's completely normal to feel that way. This is a man you loved once, the father of your daughter. Of course it is hurtful to imagine him with other women. But even though it might make you jealous to imagine him with other people, I think you are important and don't deserve to be treated badly. You are clearly a good mom since you are struggling with this decision and taking the well-being of your daughter into account. Your husband has a problem and if you were to get a divorce it would be because of his choices, it wouldn't be your fault. It can take a lot of time, money, and emotional strength to endure a divorce, but from what you've shared I think that would probably be best for you. I think you could do it and that you would feel much happier once you got out of this marriage.